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with , employees in 26 countries, I guess the costs for the open bar got a little out of hand. LOL. We did have our "holiday" potluck yesterday with our group. Mostly ghastly inedible stuff that people think is "cute", but there was a really cool Asian influenced dish. Happy Hanukkah to all my Jewish friends! grannies Bryant sex
I know that when friends have been attracted to someone, I'm the first one to encourage them to ask her out, even just as a friendship date to coffee or maybe a movie and such. Why am I such a big chicken? I met her about a month ago, we hit it off as she so warmly welcomed me to the gathering that I was attending for the first time. I've seen her since a few times at similar gatherings and have talked to her. We've exchanged e-mails and in both the e-mails and brief one-one-one conversations, she's been very kind and personable. For whatever reason, I've just never been comfortable asking someone out maybe it was because the very first time I did, over 20 years ago, over dinner I said to her, "I've never asked someone out on a date before until tonight" to which she said "You consider this a date??????" Ouch. I just don't know how to do this. The last e-mail I sent her was after I'd seen her and she wasn't feeling well I e-mailed her and said that I hoped she was feeling better and that I had wanted to but didn't know if she wanted s what I was really asking was if it would be okay to her. I hadn't gotten a reply e-mail all week. Tonight she did e-mail me saying that she's feeling better and I have a great holiday tomorrow. She didn't mention if it was okay to her. Today I actually did her, let it ring 4 times and then up without leaving a message. Why am I such a big chicken?? In the past, my girlfriends did the asking. I've probably walked away from potentially awesome friendships because I don't know what to do after 'hello'. The fear of rejection is just too paralyzing yet she hasn't given me any 'messages' that are rejecting of me she's just not a big "let me check my e-mail several times a day" kind of person. Sorry so I'm tired of being paralyzed by fear of rejection I am a good friend and I have really good friends but when attraction is in the mix, the big chicken suit comes out. How did you do this? If she's not the asking type, am I up a creek with no paddle?? sexy military cowboy looking for ltrit's just a car thing. People are weird driving. OK, so, he has a family, and a mom in particular, who are going to great lengths to include you in their Thanksgiving plans. Does *he* really want to go. Assuming he does I understand you're intimidated by his huge family. Believe me, I understand that feeling. But, if at all possible, that's just something you need to get past, just for the occasional holiday or two, once a year. For your boyfriend. Personally, I've found my best method is to RELAX, make sure *I'm* having a good time, rather than worrying what other people think of me, and keep reminding myself *I* like myself, *I* approve of me, and I AM GOOD ENOUGH. After that, most all that's left is money and logistical stuff. Most people have or and a half days off from work for Thanksgiving. Would you be able to complete this trip to his aunt's in that time period, without having to take any time off work (or arranging your work schedule so that you make up for the time off)? Also, let's try to mitigate the stress you'll feel after driving. Is it possible you could arrive to the general area Wednesday night, even if very late? Stay with a non-intimidating friend or family member nearby for the night? Or even a motel room with your family. You can easily find a room in TN for under $50, tax included. Pack a picnic dinner and breakfast for the family, so you don't need to spend to eat out. So with a $50 motel room and $XX in gas, using your own car, could you manage it responsibly, for his sake? Could he do the treating, since really it's his invitation? I know it feels like if you spend money, you should enjoy yourself. Or that you should enjoy yourself on the holidays. But, for a lot of people, the holidays are a time to just put in a little relationship effort. casual relationship
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