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First time posting, so please bear with me :) Was married for 18 years, officially separated since Feb. X wife has not worked until recently My mistake (and I know this was stupid on my part) was not separating financial stuff until about a year later Since Feb. date of separation: I've paid % of joint debt (approx $40k) I've paid % of all household expenses (approx $85K) including mortgage, taxes, insurance, utilities, groceries, car payments, etc. even though I was not living there. I was trying to keep her and my two high school age in the house until they graduated. I was under no separation decree to do this. I did it because I thought it was the right thing to do. Since separation, my X wife has also raided the the account, buying palm readings, on-line spell casting, sex toys, thousands in clothing, giving money to one of her boyfriends, etc. I have records of all of this. We'll be going to our mandetory settlement conference. Here's what I'm hoping to find out: For the joint debt, would a judge me 50% of what I've paid? If she has no cash, how would I receive that back? reduced spousal support? Any thoughts? Any experiences out there? For excessive spending on her part for the above stuff, what would a judge decide? I want to go into the settlement conference knowing what I can expect if she stone-walls me and we have to go to court. I've attempted to negotiate with her on several occasions, but she's poo-poo'd everything I've presented. I also agreed to pay for % of legal fees if she'd go to a mediator, which we did, and when we finished and she saw what the settlement was, she didn't like the amount, and told me to pound sand. Another $3K down the toilet .. I know this rambles a bit, but any advice out of experience would be GREATLY appreciated!!! Thanks! Havelock looking to fuckis no doubt i have had "challenges" with other posters funy thing is i tend to respond exactly how i am responded to. It just seems that if there is anything outside of some tacid aggreemnt with what is being posted is not welcomed warmly. Also bear in mind there are plenty that come to my defense even though they even disagree with me. You have no reason to parse words or be creaful with me just dont recoil in horror and disgust because i do not fit into some little box. We all get stereotyped to some extent and because i am not your cookie cutter kinkster i have gotten exactly that. The last thing want to do however is make any one feel uncomfortable or tired. I have purposely tried to avoid certain topics when they come up and in the end maybe i just don't belong here. Only time tell i guess. Probably best to leave at that and at least we have an understanding. wants for dating
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