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fuck red Tin Can Bay Revelation!! Holy shit! I just figured out how to express WHY it's so unsettling when someone emails me and wants to see a picture. It's not that I'm afraid I'm ugly (I'm cute but not a supermodel) and it's not because I'm afraid of rejection (I'm too old to worry about your delicate sensibilities anymore). I HATE it when you solicit a picture from because someone who NEEDS to see who I am before they agree to meet up with me is not coming from the same place or traveling to similar regions, as I am. If you can't READ who I am in my words, either you're not good at comprehension, you didn't bother to read more than the headline, or, most likely, you're a male playing dress-up in CL-land. Voila. CL trolls and "women" who think it's all about how you appear rather than how you are, are now on notice: I will no longer feel bad when I refuse to send you a picture, and I will no longer even bother chatting further with you once you ask for one. Hah! I don't have to feel guilty or wrong. You-all just need to check yourselves and leave that baggage at home. Whew. That's a relief.
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being supportive, dufus. You assumed that since she said there was nothing you could do for her, then you should leave her to deal with this by herself. Women don't usually think that way. MEN do, but not women. Instead, women usually gravitate *towards* each other (or to understanding SOs) for emotional support; not close themselves off to be alone. Rule #1: DO NOT attempt to tell her what she should do to feel better. You're not Mr. Fixit; she doesn't want you to find solutions for her problems. She wants you to hold her hand, listen to her woes, let her cry on your shoulder, and hold her close. That's all. Rule #2: DO NOT blow off her emotions as unimportant, unrealistic, or counter-productive. Just let her vent, cry, complain, or bitch; while you stay out of the line of fire. Once she's vented, she'll calm down and feel better. Rule #3: Understand that "no, there's nothing you can do for me" means this: no, you're not a doctor and you can't fix this cancer for me. But I'm, and I don't want you to know how I am; so I'm going to tell you that you can't help, while at the same time I *expect* and *need* you to stand ready to catch me when it becomes too much to handle by myself. So yes, there's nothing you can do FOR me. But there's a whole lot you can do to make me feel better while I go through this by myself. Make sense? Send her flowers, make homemade goofy cards to tell her you're thinking of her, fix her favorite dinner, distract her with and other activities, buy her a bear, mow her lawn or rotate her tires for her, or text her for no reason other than to say I you or hear her voice, ask how she's feeling today, stuff like that. people that love sex in Garrett Indiana
The issue isn't whether or not a 22yr old can be in an LTR with a 38 yr old. You could be 30 and still catch grief from this girl. Bear in mind tho, the posters that tell you that this isn't an LTR are more than likely correct. You need to grow thicker skin. The only way to silences this critic is to prove her wrong. Be polite, be professional, and if and when your current relationship ends, end it on good terms. Continue to do what you can to make peace in that house, and STAY NEUTRAL in any disagreements that this has with his daughter. don't say anything to this guy about his daughter, he already gets an earful from her accusations against you. Show everyone that you are not like his daughter, that you are the better, stronger woman. This is a great to what you are made of. Accept the challenge and prove your mettle. I salute you. Strength and courageous in battle. just looking for a release nsaFirst time posting, so please bear with me :) Was married for 18 years, officially separated since Feb. X wife has not worked until recently My mistake (and I know this was stupid on my part) was not separating financial stuff until about a year later Since Feb. date of separation: I've paid % of joint debt (approx $40k) I've paid % of all household expenses (approx $85K) including mortgage, taxes, insurance, utilities, groceries, car payments, etc. even though I was not living there. I was trying to keep her and my two high school age in the house until they graduated. I was under no separation decree to do this. I did it because I thought it was the right thing to do. Since separation, my X wife has also raided the the account, buying palm readings, on-line spell casting, sex toys, thousands in clothing, giving money to one of her boyfriends, etc. I have records of all of this. We'll be going to our mandetory settlement conference. Here's what I'm hoping to find out: For the joint debt, would a judge me 50% of what I've paid? If she has no cash, how would I receive that back? reduced spousal support? Any thoughts? Any experiences out there? For excessive spending on her part for the above stuff, what would a judge decide? I want to go into the settlement conference knowing what I can expect if she stone-walls me and we have to go to court. I've attempted to negotiate with her on several occasions, but she's poo-poo'd everything I've presented. I also agreed to pay for % of legal fees if she'd go to a mediator, which we did, and when we finished and she saw what the settlement was, she didn't like the amount, and told me to pound sand. Another $3K down the toilet .. I know this rambles a bit, but any advice out of experience would be GREATLY appreciated!!! Thanks! women seeking men
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