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the first years of my marriage and most of my professional life. My experience is mixed. I worked in a situation where I was on the road 3 weeks at a time and home about a week. I never cheated, but if I were to be completely honest I would have to say that it almost happened once. I was working really closely with a woman who was also on the road constantly and away from her husband. We had a ton in common, liked the same, same sense of humor, were about the same age, both from LA, etc. She was, funny and brilliant. We started getting really close to the point that one day she ended up in my suite for a working lunch and we started getting too friendly. We both pulled back and told each other that it couldn’t happen. I had only been married for a year and she had a 3 year old. We Loved our partners and didn’t want to fuck that up. We agreed that outside of work, we just couldn’t be friends. It sucked, but it worked. She ended up taking a term position in Atlanta and I really didn’t her much after. I have seen both men and women cheat, probably in about equal number to be honest. When you are on term assignment, work out of town a lot etc. it gets really lonely, you drink more then you should, you get closer to those around you then you would otherwise and things can happen. Not everyone cheats, but it happened more than I would have thought when I was. After that incident I learned to keep a much better professional distance from people, but when you are on the road as much as I was, you don’t want to lock yourself in your hotel room and never come out. Human contact is important. I when my wife graduated from college I started bringing her on the road with me quite often when I would go places she wanted to and that was fantastic. Also people I worked with got to meet my wife and put a face with a name, that definitely helped to take away temptation and made both of us feel closer, even when away. So yeah, it does happen, sometimes its out of the blue and sometimes its intentional. But it isn’t like in the. sexy Bridgeton New Jersey student looking for se
I tend to prefer the feminine and androgynous part of the gender scale in people of either sex. My feeling is Ladyboys are ladies too. I don't have a masculine/feminine dynamic with anyone including men. But hey to each their own. "Butch" can mean anything from a woman who likes comfortable clothes, a strong woman, a unique way of being a woman or people who are a little male identified. There's a whole spectrum. While some people might like being "the -" or "the boyfriend" that concept can grate on others who are tired of being seen as "like men". It's unique to the individual. I think they have taken offense to "hey I'm not a lesbian". Lesbians are no more uniform than bifolks. Just remember we've all been labeled or treated as different at some point or another so if you don't want people to prejudge you you can't do the same to them. The only thing we all have in common is the political reality of not being straight, which in the end is enough. I also think some people were just joshing with you and the humor/affect didn't translate in written form. That's why people should never argue by e-mail or text messaging. Also it's one thing for people to appreciate a quality in others they lack themselves and a totally different thing to disparage a quality in the people one dates. If you look down on "girliness" or think of feminine people as just people who giggle and wear dresses it might not be to date women who have a trait you disparage a bit. I liked a quote I saw on a butch/femme website: Femmes are the subject of not the. While that dynamic is not my personal preference I can appreciate that sentiment. let meet before my flightI have been a cabaret singer in clubs for more than 30 years and I can tell you that a significant amount of humor involves being mean and spiteful to others. Think of your favorite drag performer emcee-ing a drag show. don't we all to hear them rip someone apart, as as it's not us? Look at the nightclub acts of nationally-known performers such as Khriss, Amazing (who is no longer with us) or Nakoma. The basic premise is that, as as someone laughs at what you say, you can tell people, "it was a joke, get over it!" People who are uncomfortable in public forums such as these often laugh more out of nervousness or discomfort, not because they think it's funny. But the performer thinks the laugh makes it OK to be as mean and spiteful as he wants. That's just my little bit of psychoanalysis. I think the problem is that, while we expect and enjoy this kind of venom at a drag show, you didn't expect it here and you took it as bad manners, rather than just the kind of humor we've been blessing by attending these "live" entertainment venues for so years. gothic dating
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