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Being diagnosed with another disease, doesn't automatiy raise her to sainthood, nor does it make her a great wife suddenly. Do you go to meetings? It be a good idea to go to a few, get all the support you can find. Stay strong. You can pick up the pieces and go on from here. Oh, btw you are not in charge of keeping her secrets. If the family needs to know about her use, then they should know. i want a handjob in public
Feel better now? Assumptive it is to say I'm manipulative and attention seeking. I purposely kept the first post under the new handle short because someone suggested that I keep posts short and not write blog-like stories. Regarding marriage equality, no matter how I explain it, some people, including you it seems, don't get that I was wanting to hear different perspectives. I've never really talked about marriage equality with a bunch of lesbian/bi/queer women. I was curious to know (a) their perspective on what is and (b) how does that affect them as a result. Not all women want to get married, so marriage equality might be a moot point. No matter how I could have approached the subject, I would have been bitch-slapped either way. I over-explain, then I get accused of being overly wordy and not eliciting conversation. I under-explain, then I get accused of being attention seeking and manipulative. I'm secure in myself to not come to a new forum and try every means possible to seek attention. I actually do have a life, a real life with real friends. Logiy speaking, it would make little to no sense to be attention seeking and manipulative while using my pen name which is associated with a community I'm developing, and a blog that I've held for years. Even when I switched handles in this forum, I was clear about my identity instead of creating a new persona. In saying "I am being shrewd," I was letting others know I'm picking my battles wisely, because there seems to be a lot of individuals in the forum who are hell-bent on correcting every single thing I post. It's hard to feel safe in a place meant to encourage community when there are pit bulls lurking in every corner of the house. I've made choices, careful choices in words and actions here so that I could deflect direct attacks and put-downs, while still managing to be myself, and to say what I mean and mean what I say. If I lacked self-confidence, I would have bailed when the first pit bull sunk her teeth into me. You have no idea who I really am, and to base it on the shit-storm of posts is rather unfair. So, to the rest of you who reading this, who have something to get off your chest hit me with you best shot. I won't play nice any more. discreet married Changyonninambohyonof flaws. Given your behavior, eventually your odds of seroconversion are good. That doesn't seem to bother you; ok. Your life. Since your partner(s) seem to have been predominantly HIV+, the threat you pose to HIV- guys is, I suppose, less than it could be. I admit I was nervous during my first HIV test; I was nervous about sex in general, and, at the time, HIV was still much thought of in my world the straight world as a death sentence. I avoided sex for quite awhile after the first neg result. But I thought about the ramifications of sex, and decided that I would never want to run around worrying about catching a deadly/chronic/life-altering disease from every partner, NOR did I want to worry about becoming a vector for said disease. Consequently, no matter what, I use condoms faithfully for all anal sex. I am almost exclusively a top, which lessens my overall statistical risk SOMEWHAT, but I find that with condomed sex I enjoy it more than I would if I coupled it with all the worry of barebacking. I do get tested for everything ever 6 months; never had a positive result of any kind, but I consider the testing my duty to myself and my sexual community. I disagree with you that there is a happy medium. HIV is a life form. It clings to life, desperately. Its mode of life is infection and reproduction. To date, there is no reliable prevention, and no cure. Methods of treatment, to date, have all shown signs of eventual failure, and all have side effects which are at best no fully known, at worst, deadly-toxic. Meanwhile, HIV, like diseases, grows resistant at an ever increasing rate and through various biological means. slow dating
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