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Great Expectations, Redo. First, do you have a sense of humor? You do? Terrific.
Are you single? In this case, "single" means NOT married, NOT just separated, NOT involved with anyone and
NOT looking for someone to pay your rent until "yo babydaddy get outa jail."
Yea? Then keep reading.
Are you Caucasian or Asian? Yes? Perfect.
Are you smart enough to not use tobacco?
You are? Great! I like you already.
Now tell me you have enough self respect and self control that you don't weigh much over 200 pounds.
Still reading? You're one in a million!
Are you faithful? L.T.R. minded? Might even consider marriage someday?
Yes? Hey, me too!.
Now, before we book that cruse ship, I must somehow pass your screening as well.
Let's see if I can squeak by
I'm blue eyed, embarrassingly healthy with all my own teeth and (dark blond) hair, B.M.I. of 24, divorced with no kids, educated, employed, reasonably responsible , reasonably respectable, homeowner and debt free. I'm neat and organized, always clean of hygiene but not always clean of mind.
I'm a pretty good cook and a passable mechanic. ( I have not yet confused the two kinds of grease.)
I'd rather go out and paint the town during the week, then on week ends, when everyone else
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I like long walks, lazy Sunday afternoons, hotubing under a full moon on the deck, summer drives in the country with the top down, looking for the perfect spot to unpack the roast chicken, potato salad, cheese and wine. I prefer rock over country, cat over dog, Mary Ann, over Ginger.
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Then I went on vacation for a week. We didn't talk every day but I thought about him. I was visiting family and I told them about this guy. They joked and teased me because I probably talked about him a little too much. I thought he was great. He is intelligent, we share the same very warped sense of humor, we agree politiy, we have had very similar odd life experiences, we dislike the same foods, we enjoy the same music. We click. We understand one another. When I he answers, when he s I answer because I want to, not because I feel obligated to. When I got back, he invited me to his house for a barbecue and to meet his best friend and friend's wife. I asked if we could cook together. We went shopping together, we prepared food together and when we cooked together the first time, it was like we had been a cooking team forever. Our dates progressed like this for months. NEVER, not one single time in say the first 6 months we were together did it ever occur to me that this guy could be my soul mate. We were sleeping together, walking around naked in front of one another, and after 6 months, living together. We don't have. If there had been involved it never would have progressed this quickly. At the time we moved in together, we started talking marriage. This was not after 3 weeks of "knowing" one another. This was after we knew what each other's poop smelled like. This was after we dealt with a sick parent together. This was after we knew all the details of another's finances. This was after we both saw that we paid our car payments on time and each had a savings account and neither of us racked up credit card bills and that we had similar taste in furniture and similar ideas how much it was OK to spend on things. hung white boy looking for a deep deep throat
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