Rambling A over a year ago, I passed up the chance of having the one person I always wanted, because I wanted my freedom. I wanted just myself again, afer years of trying to love someone else, who was determined to erase my existence I guess we could say. I said mean, heartless things that I regret.I was drowning in mid air trying to the reality of everything happening around me, that I hurt the one person I never wanted to hurt. I think back to those conversations a lot of times I just want to cry, how could I let someone break me down so badly, that all I could say to the one person I actually loved was harsh, shattering words? How in the world did I let things get so out of control, that I couldnt even control myself? Then the hundreds of memories of the love I so wanted flashes through, its just.. a hurricane of mixed emotions.. Then I block everything out, its too overwhelming for me to deal with. Tears are not something I wish to shed. I couldnt apologize even though I want to, nothing I could say or do, could erase what I said and did. Time doesnt rewind, there are no do overs. All that because at the time, I wanted myself and my freedom. Well I got my freedom and myself. Turns out I've too much freedom these days. Most nights I lay awake with a thousand memories, words, or just random thoughts rambling through my mind, to fall asleep and dream of the love I once upon a time knew. I guess the upside is I dont dream every night, well not that i always re, but these days its that I sleep. Its crazy to me, that I gave up the chance because I wasnt exactly sure if what I believed I wanted was what I wanted or thoughts of someone else. Makes no sense im sure. But now that I've had this year to myself, the freedom of doing whatever I please, no one hounding me, or trying to change who I am, Ive realized a lot of things. Like that I always changed what I said I wanted in a guy over the years.. example "I don't like little guys I like bigger guys". Only I wasnt cl Array Bellevue Nebraska girls looking for sexDiscreet blowjobs lbs clean ddf. Email me stats and pic. Looking for this afternoon. women who want sex in `arbababad sex moms
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japanese women for sex tonight with a woman who a.) is simply using him because she isn't mature enough to stand on her own two feet. b.) has such a defeatist attitude. c.) would probably be a "yes-woman" without her own mind. You're setting yourself up to be, walked all over and worse., one year is not always enough to get over someone. It took me years of being single. And guess what that years also did for me? Taught me that I being alone. No one to "please," no one to argue with, no eggshells to walk on, complete and utter freedom and relaxation. And I have a TON of friends who would be there in a heartbeat for me if I ever needed anything. For a relationship, there has to be give and take, not just take. The poor schmuck who married you would be doing a whole hell of a lot of giving, and that is totally not fair to him. It is VERY selfish of you. Get involved in hobby activities, volunteer, whatever. Do something that fulfills you. Figure out what about you (YOU are the common denominator) is attracting non-serious guys. Because they are out there in ABUNDANCE. And STOP looking at each guy as a potential husband. Just live in the moment, for -'s sake! Loneliness and desperation can be spotted from a thousand away it's actually driving away all the good guys. What did you want from your post in this forum? A pity party? You've done enough of that on your own. Nobody here is going to say "Awh, poor, poor clgth." Lost Springs live sex cam
ca65 black pussy Ahuimanu olI've had some really good weeks. It could be driving around with my friends at 4am in college, singing to the radio and just feeling like I belonged. Or it could have been tossing spagetti out my best friend's apartment window just for the fun of it. Or the night the person I loved most in the world told me she loved me for the first time. Or climbing up the outside of the student center to glue an egg with a sombrero on it. Or one of the giggle-fests I used to have with one of my old roommates. Or just sitting on the street blowing bubbles. Life has some serious ups and downs, so I try to appreciate a good moment when it comes along. free local dating
fucking at the hot Ocean Springs Free pulled out and the slave was left alone in the dark. She couldn’t hear anything but a slight mechanical humming. Oh, now water swishing; now dripping and a warm towel was placed over covering her pubs. Pressure and then sweet pain, as chains were attached to her nipple rings and tugged, first on the right and then on the left. Names; everything has a name, well, most things. The towel was and warm gel was massaged into her pubs. Then gentle scraping and tugging as her pubic hairs were smoothly shaved. She felt a crack of pain as the towel was snapped against her ass, then placed back over for a soft cleanup. This combination of pain and gentle care was driving her wild and she longed to touch herself anywhere; she would do anything to touch. He even had her thinking in terms of now! someone please touch my -!?! And then he was back. His cock bounced against her lips and she opened and took him in. She wasn’t allowed to name his -; “only it or cock” he’d admonished. She thought about how he must have measured to have her mouth just the right height for this upside down performance, as he started pumping her mouth faster. Then he started nibbling on her labia; oh how exquisite! Upside down 69 makes that easy. No names for them yet, she thought about her lips; but he’d have one for each side before. She arched her back and swayed left to get his tongue to touch her clit, Piercy; named after her first erogenous piercing. But he anticipated her move and kept away just far enough to drive her crazy. in silverton looking for now
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