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I have no idea why you allowed your stbx to 'kick' you out of the house, she has no ability to 'make sure you never your daughter again' unless you've pulled some shitty crap oh she can try but not if you don't let this shit happen. First and foremost change your focus. I get that you need some basics but you need to educate yourself as to the process and details of divorce. You need to learn the law, study it. You have computer access so get cracking. e up the revised statutes for your state, read up on custody law, dissolution of marriage, division of assets you left but you should have made sure to have the papers in hand before you did. I get it, you were fucking gut shot and your world blew up in your face. It's happened to a lot of people but you need to deal with it. You need tax records assembled, list ALL of your assets and debts..get it organized. Go back to the house if you need to gather the records, take someone with you as a witness stay calm, no anger, no emotions at all. You have rights she is NOT in control. And for fuck sake FILE FOR DIVORCE, start the process and lock it down legally she can still fuck with your credit until you do, you are still exposed to her games. You let this slide while you try to assemble stuff you are taking a huge risk. Also, you do NOT talk to her except for when it is necessary and when you do you give her no emotion, keep your tone civil and chose your words carefully. She is your legal adversary in a lawsuit. So bite your tongue. And give up this attitude of 'those places depress me' so fucking what, you do what you need to do regardless. You move forward in spite of what's going on. Take action, get plastic silverware and wash it if that's what it takes. Make sure you have finances for some legal fees, find out how much it costs to file..and if you have no money for an attorney, LEARN THE LAWS and the costs, contact the county clerk, go down a talk to them, take notes and study like it's the most important exam of your life. Read websites, books. You'll survive but life isn't going to be fun for a while looking to have fun and sex personal down thereThe JOINT checking and savings accounts (assuming there is/was one) balance not spent on Community debt as of the actual day of separation on court paperwork (or date is when you both decided to get divorced and took concrete steps like moving out of the same bedroom, etc if no filing done yet) is between the two of you; each should take their half and put into their own Separate checking account in only their name; account should be closed as as feasible. If you opened or kept an account in JUST your name during the marriage you have to PROVE that the current balance does not contain ANY earnings you made prior to the separation date and after date of marriage- documentation is your friend here. Any earnings paid after the date of separation are each your own Separate Property. How about houses and cars and debt? Any purchased or incurred before the marriage are Separate Property, all purchased during the marriage and not with Separate money is Community Property and subject to equal division or an equalization payment to the shorted party. Now, once you've done all the above calculations- go back to him with the figures for Separate on one spreadsheet and the figures for Community on another that divides up the stuff into two columns (for you and for him) and add how much you figure the household stuff is worth USED to his column too. THAT is your starting point for 'negotiations', and what a Judge likely rule for if it ends up going to trial vs a mediated agreement or an out of court agreement you both sign and file. sexy women over 40
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