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I guess I have never looked at sex as a 'boundary' to relationships but I do dishonesty as the ultimate in dealbreaker for any relationship, be it sexual or otherwise. And, just so you know, people here do beat each other (with consent) and live in, happy marriages or otherwise close relationships. fuck buddy Cairnryan
Dear compassionate one, Please never disregard your gut feelings about a person and/or situation. Disregarding our intuition usually lands us in a mess or in danger. You are obviously very wise and mature to pick up on these red flags. They are definitely not in your imagination. Your "friend" is obviously operating from a state of fear. Fear promotes irrational and neurotic thoughts and behaviors. He be suffering from some degree of post-traumatic stress syndrome, but would have to a professional for a diagnosis. It is not wrong, weak, or unhealthy for you to feel compassion for him for his losses and his current state of pain. However, as any professional counselor tell you, all your and compassion won't fix him. It is natural to be attracted to his positive attributes. But from the obsessive/compulsive behaviors he's demonstrated in such a very short period of time, his unhealthy side would dominate the relationship. His need to make it official so is an indication that he is not operating from a place a strength. He is making the very common mistake that of us often do by jumping back into a relationship to heal the wounds and fill the emptiness of the one(s) that previously ended. I one thing that you learned from this is that if something does not "feel" right, there is usually a valid reason. I have one important word for you boundaries! You compromised your boundaries in the beginning by giving in to his pressure for a commitment too. You recovered by re-establishing your boundaries by declaring that you not open your life to a person who does not respect your time, personal space, etc But do you how you felt bad for establishing that boundary with him.? There is a great book titled "Boundaries" by Cloud and Townsend that you find very insightful. I think anyone would benefit from reading that book. Boundaries can be tricky, but stick to your instincts. It's understandable that you his good side, but please don't trick yourself into thinking that you can somehow have the side without the weight and toll of the unhealthy. Perhaps you could find peace in praying for him.? Be intentional and determined to meet a guy who has his wonderful qualities. Please don't settle! Best wishes to you! call girls Avila BeachAs I it so far, we have roughly this exchange going on P1: Our play can hurt sometimes. P2. It hurt you, but it doesn't hurt me. Now shut the fuck up. That's one fucked up bdsm scene, in my opinion. And it's a sad statement about our (in)ability to act as participants, let alone experts, in consensual anything. Right now the best that can be said is that we're good at being a bad example. I we can bring this back to some kind of center. And while I'm motivated to write this because of the current discussion about how to deal with the more graphic content, it's actually been a problem here for longer than that, at least to me. There's been a really unpleasant thread of just out and out shitty behavior here for at least the past month. A good example is when someone wanders in and asks an innocent or even totally ignorant question, there seems to be almost a koi-like feeding frenzy to who can be the first and meanest to ridicule them with "that's not kinky" or "take it to the rofo" or "learn to use e." I don't know what's triggered this kind of behavior, but even before this discussion it was almost enough to have me simply stop participating here. There's bdsm, and then there's *just plain violence*, and we seem to be having real trouble recognizing where the boundary is. I we keep talking about it enough to be able to find it again and get back on the rght side of it.. Suggestions to follow later, if anyone wants them. single dating sites free
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