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Been married for almost 4 years, no and in the last 5 months I've been feeling very disconnected from husband. I've communicated this to him and that I have some concerns over what feels like some distance. We both work very hard and sometimes hours, but we almost always make the time to have dinner together and discuss our day, challenges, positives, negatives etc. Every time there is a discussion about how I am feeling, he tells me that I shouldn't feel that way, and that the way I need and accept is f'ed up, I shouldn't need to be filled with physical all of the time. He says he does plenty for me, but when I ask what those things are, he can't be specific. Sex is a once a month thing, and based on my initiation; and substantial amounts of rejection throughout the inbetween times. It seems every time I try to show him my, it goes overlooked. After having another discussion with him this morning, he told me to just stay at work and don't come back and that if what he does isn't good enough, we're done. I don't need a slap on the ass and be told good job, I want his quality time, communication and physical attention; and certainly not all the time, but more than once a month. I want the husband back who did those things before we were married. I didn't grow up with a very accepting or loving family, so I know it's something that I have strived to work toward. Counseling (both of us), reading books, and having a positive self image have brought me a way in our relationship. We have both wanted, but have come to realize that due to medical issues (mine), after trying to 4 years, that having our own not be possible. He says he's okay with it, but I'm wondering if this is the underlying problem causing this disconnect. I him to pieces and can't imagine my life without him; but I am also very hurt emotionally and wanting him physiy, only to be rejected hurts so bad. Where do I go from here? Help please sex datin Danpan* For him, not a soul mate, just great hot sex. * You might, but he might not be looking for an emotional connection right now and the sex is one thing, but staying over is 'couple-committed' like behavior ( to him ), and he doesn't want that either, right now, or with you. Leaving is a control thing for him, he might tell himself he hasn't lost his self, to you by leaving each time. The question asked of him repeatedly might feed his ego of being wanted ( he likes it, keeps doing it ) * Q's. Is your house clean, do you have room mates, an animal ? * Is you bed big enough for two to sleep comfortably ? What size is his bed at home ? * Is you decor totally girlie' ? * In the reverse, Do you visit have sex at his place, stay over ? * Commute time from you house to his house ? maybe he wants to wake up in his own bed, be around his own things, have his own routine, his clothes, etc., things in kitchen ? * He might be seeing another woman, you are his sex girl' So being home for late night texts, his computer, home phone, or early morning s, he's always there for her'. He can explain where he was a few hours last night ( with you ) virtual date
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