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I've read the stream here and she has a history w/ depression and meds. In addition to having the actual clinical condition, I suspect she also has some of the acquired behaviour habits of people who suffer from depression, meaning that she can be passive, sit back and let others take charge and get things done. Totally understand you feeling resentment. I think its impt that you let her know not only are there terrible inequities, but you've really begun to resent her for not generating. For two weeks, keep a list of all the activities you do in the home. don't list her activities, list yours. Then take some time to reflect on this list yourself before talking with her about it. If you aren't getting enough time to take care of yourself, YOU need to put that in. Resentment is when we give more than we have to give. YOU need to make adjustments in what you give. And you need to have honest, authentic dialogue with her about what you want and need from her. Give her a list of items that you want her to manage on-goingly. Not like a demand, but a request for partnership. Also, schedule time for you and her to do things together. Even if it's a walk in the park. You gotta reinvent your roles otherwise they become to restrictive. Lastly, you haven't said it, but it's in the space with her history of depression. If she is depressed, empower her to get a good therapist and a good psychiatrist and get on meds. Make diet, nutrition, exercise adjustments, etc. The problem isn't lack of info it's using the info we already have. I'm betting she knows exactly what to do to manage her depression. About you being passive, I invite you to take on new ways of being like being bold and self expressed inside your relationship. Take on being her partner and you'll likely find a good partner. You'll find the partner you married and had a with. All the best, naughty girls of Shawnee
With this amount of money in play, you really need to consult a CPA about the tax considerations. You could get hit with a huge tax if you sell this house and don't put the money into another house. The other smart way to use the house if you don't sell it and buy another house is to turn it into income property, that is, rent it. We inherited a share of my DW's dad's condo and put it into a new house while keeping the one we had as a rental. The rent we collected over the next ten years put my daughter through a very nice year private college. It is my understanding that if you sold the house and put the money into a private account, you would he hit with capital gains tax for every dollar you make on the private account *in addition* to a big tax upon selling the house. i am so curious how hot is a fwb situationJust in case you need it, ambivalence is the coexistence of opposing attitudes or feelings, which I am experiencing much to my dismay. A while ago my husband cheated. I understood why and decided to forgive him. My feelings of for him are present but in addition, I now also feel deep dislike (actually hate but I don't like to use that word) for him at the same time. It's really strange and alarming. I've gone to counseling and been assured that in time one feeling dominate .but it's going on years now and I still hold both feelings equally. Exactly equally. I simultaneously both and hate my husband. At the same time I want to be with him forever and never have married him in the first place. I'm going crazy .if you've never felt ambivalence then you're not going to understand but if you have, please write and tell me that it's going to go one way or the other sometime. It isn't like sometimes I just him and have a break from the hate. It also isn't like I ever just hate him, because I always feel the. I don't even understand how this can be possible. Help if you can. girls xxx
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