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I agree with 'stachemeister in that the forms of objectification that appeal to me are be using as a footstool or end table as my partner decompresses at the end of the day quietly getting him off as he reads the paper or being instructed how to get him off as he cooks. Being a tool to help him shed the vestiges of a day and sink into the a quiet and relaxing night. If he can't sleep, providing the means to tire him out. Basiy being a fucktoy or tool to bring about his pleasure. I also get off hard on being forced to maintain the focus of pleasing him while he is groping and molesting me to assume that he's not touching me to please me but to please himself (and that I MUST NOT get off). To me objectification is the shedding of self to bring about comfort to him. It passes the point of doing it for him because he express pleasure in you it's doing it because it brings about his comfort without him ever feeling he even need acknowledge you. Sometimes I've imagined objectification in the form of being used as a game board or a chess table (with the grid painted on my back) for a gathering of his friends Yeah it is all about being brave for me too, trusting someone to do things with and to me that strike me as exceedingly uncomfortable. And then the occasional 'good girl' for the bravery :). And privately being held in a sort of cherished status by him for being brave and shucking self for overcoming fear. Being ed names like 'little fuckpuppet' and 'fucktoy' and being meticulously instructed on how to please him is objectification to me too. discreet hookups Holyoke
You give permission for what you allow. You have allowed him to be lazy about this relationship, and frankly, you sound more like his mother than his girlfriend. He knows you're not going anywhere, because you are soooooo in luuuuvvvvv. So far, you've treated him the way you want to be treated. So think of it this way: He has shown you the way HE wants to be treated. So give him what he wants. Stop with the 5 AM breakfast shit. Leave a box of Cheerios on the table if you're feeling generous. He starts to do his own laundry. Stop and grab your own dinner before you get home, and walk in already fed he's on his own for dinner. YOU ARE REWARDING HIM FOR TREATING YOUR POORLY. After all that, you STILL leave him and a sweet note?!? Talk about mixed messages!!!!!!! Stop pleading. Stop crying. Stop begging. Find some dignity and grow a spine. "Never grow a wishbone where your backbone ought to be." And stop rewarding poor behavior! He does not FEEL what you are feeling. So make it easier for him to feel it. (This is a reason why I'm not a big fan of living together before marriage. Right now you have all the responsibilities of marriage, and absolutely none of the perks. How is this a win-win for you?) The other option is to simply walk, but you aren't going to do that. So your basic problem is this: You aren't going to change him unless he decides it's in his best interests to change. So either you put up and shut up, or you make it clear what the expectations are and follow through with consequences if they don't materialize. You're about 2 years and 51 weeks too late, but some CAN be taught. You are too to be this -'s maid and dog. free chatline in Dover United StatesAmateur woman seeking adult fuck mature men sex
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