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This I discovered my wife was writing a sex diary online detailing her sexual adventures of the past year with other men, she claimed it was fantasy writing this but admitted it was all real after I found of her having sex with a guy in one of her e-mails this month. She told me in it was over once we started marriage counseling but admitted last week she's still seeing one of the guys since we started marriage counseling 3 months ago but claims she's not having sex with him although she has strong feelnigs for him. She's gotten into hardcore BDSM including diary entries about the guy putting an electric collar on her and forcing her to let her be licked by a dog between her legs and now a secret journal she didn't think I found about him tying her up and forcing her to have sex with him and another last week. She says I have to bite the bullet and endure her treatment till she works out whether she wants our relationship to work out and I'm in a bind because we have 3 and have been together 15 years. She swears no sex is involved but since I found the note about last week, it makes me wonder what's true and what's not. She lies to me all the time about everything and tells the truth occasionally then says "you don't believe me" "so why should I tell you anything or the truth anyway". Our is now starting to hate her and she doesn't realize it. I'm worried about how this affect him and his outlook on women when he becomes an adult. He's asked me to try and work things out with her for at least 3 more months. The marriage counselor says the recent diaries could just be a way of venting and expressing her sexuality which would be better than acting on them but I'm suspicious that she's still lying and doing all these things and all the stress that puts on me. The marriage counselor says I need to learn to trust or simply divorce but she told me she was going to a girlfriends last tuesday and I put a GPS tracker on our car and it showed she went to the house of the guy she's been having an affair with for over a year for 3 hours about way thru the evening. She still writing sex journals online about being tied up, choked and anal sex. We fought over the weekend and she said that she didn't care about trying to earn my trust anymore and how outrageous it was for me to put a GPS on the car. looking for monday afternoon fun with a bbwmarriage has been a bit sine his first affair 3 years ago, i forgave him, big mistake..For the past 3 years i have begged him that if ever he wanted a divorce or met someone to just tell me, begged him to please not cheat again as that is devastating. Well, he pulled rug out from under me again. Last week he flew her from Calif to NYC and they spent 5 days in city, he left for 10 days today to go to Calif. obviously to be with her. dating married man
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