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after 8 yrs gone, and 4 of those yrs, we are leagally divorced, "he" still carries the "MONEY" CHIP on his shoulder.. Money comes first in his life, then whom ever is important at the time.. he has 3 yrs left of support, (my daugher is in college)and has recently started a case, taking me back to court to get the support lowerd.. when ever we do have to talk, (which is hardly ever) he is cordial, but you can actually hear the attitude in his voice. "I" have been the one who is always initiating, in letters (how we communicate the most) that it is time to let GO of the past, for our daughter sake.. but nope.. because he still has to pay me I get the cold shoulder.. I just when men lie, cheat, leave, and we get kicked to the curb, but yet, they remain the ones mad..go figure lonely married women to be bangpoint of CL. First off, there was no question, just a big rant. She refers to a "relationship" which she is trying to mask as a friendship, but very poorly. How the girlfriend/wife feels/doesnt feel is irrelevant. Whether she was in the room during the or not does not matter. Its not about the girlfriend. Its about this woman's (or more likely little girl's) obsession with someone who is not interested in a term "relationship" with her. She needs to seek help or move on because as much as she hurt all the other people in the story SHE IS HURTING HERSELF MORE. Look at the facts: 1. She was ing him in another country. Knowing that she was in another country. Is this the behaviour of a friend (or a stalker)? 2. He did not say he was busy. He said it was inappropriate. This is not the language of friends. It is the language of a teacher to a student, or a doctor to a patient, or a parent to a? 3. Did it occur to her that it WAS inappropriate to him in another country? No. 4. She defends her behaviour by saying that she won't stoop to his behaviour. That she wont respond. Then she writes him a letter about it. Really, letters ARE a response. 5. I would say that the girlfriend does not need to be "threatened" by her, but obviously the "boyfriend" has a big need to plant his penis where it does not belong. BUT the threat is not posed by the writer. My GUESS, if you must know, is that these people are co-workers or colleagues and that there was a brief affair. My guess is that this "friend" it significantly older. The writer has worked it into something more in her head. She has decided that if there was no girlfriend (or more likely wife, based on her closing line) that the path would be clear. IT WOULD NOT BE CLEAR EITHER WAY. The writer should move on. Whether she tells the wife or not should be based on her concern for the wife, not based on her own jealousy and insecurity. Likely one day she stalk someone right into a marriage and be a wife herself. Then she the other side of this "relationship". And, oh by the way, why did she post in "divorce", not some other forum? Sounds like she is hoping for a divorce here. amateurs swingers
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