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Look, I'm never going to buy some 'just happened' bullshit. Nothing like this ever 'just happens', you acted on an attraction period. When you do that there is always a risk of fucking up and hurting someone. I tell and have told people I would be like a cat in a bathtub if you wanted a relationship with me. My issues are different than your's but I've got 'em. You know, accepting that you're fucked up right now is a good thing, don't make it bigger than it needs to be. Same with this situation. You should have been clear before getting into bed but you didn't, you're human just use the experience to determine what kind of action you want to take next time and there be a next time. You want to not be a hermit get out there and 'date' but advertise exactly that, be firm with exactly that and if it cuts down the available pool then so be it. People do it all the damn time, they really do. I haven't 'dated' in a year but it's not like I'm not social I'm getting my shit together, I have some priorities and parts of my life I'm not ready to share, commitment being one of them. About 80% of the available pool drop off with that but oh well, those would be people who would only be disappointed anyway. You could also go for platonic but be serious about that, you'd be amazed how people would a companion for dancing or just hanging out but keep it that way. horny ladies Coxhoe arI think there are LOTS of happily married people, though I have no idea if it's 'most'. I think there are a few things that play into the appearance of lots of unhappy couples. 1. Generational reasons for marriage. My grandparents probably never should or would have married each other if they came of age now. They wed very and stuck it out through things I wouldn't have (like -). My mom divorced 2x. She's a boomer. I think for her generation, for some the pendulum swung the other way. Suddenly you didn't have to put up with crap and lots of people didn't however they still married. I'm 34, and though my generation is not without issues, lots of us delay marriage quite a bit, and go into it with a little different expectations. Most of my friends, and myself are very happy in our marriages. We're no where near 25 years so we'll -! Fingers crossed. Also, these days you don't HAVE to get married the way you use to, and being is loads more acceptable, so marrying the opposite sex to 'pass' isn't done as much any more. Thank goodness. 2. Unhappy people talk, happy people shut up. You'll always here more about who's unhappy than happy. I think this skews perception. 3. For some people, what they still have in common after years IS their, so I understand why that's such a hot topic. But, I sure don't think that's everyone. I know, for instance, my mom loves me and my brother more than anything and can't wait to be a grandmother. BUT, she travels, sits on local government boards, reads a ton, volunteers like mad. She's one interesting. All her friends seem equally fascinating. It's all who you surround yourself with. 4. Parting thoughts If you feel like marriage is a trap, DO NOT GET MARRIED!!! I think it's so positive that marriage is becoming reserved for those of us who REALLY want it. And I think when you do commit to someone who deeply wants to commit to you, it's actually a very freeing experience. But I deeply respect anyone who chose not to wed knowing it isn't what they want. Choice is such a wonderful thing. black online dating services
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