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Hi again all, So much has happened since my last post and all for the good. But now I am here on advice for making a smooth transition to the next step. We are spending much more time together both alone and as a family (his mine) and although he and I are ready to make the "move in together move" it is probably just not best yet for the involved. Ok for my daughter who is going into the 8th grade. We have listened to her concerns and wants and we have agreed to wait until next (YIKES almost a whole year) to actually officially make the move. The time probably go quickly anyway as I we both have places (him house, me condo) to prepare. My questions: Ideas on getting everybody (him, me, -) use to the idea of "us as a whole" vs. the ME syndrome that we all seem to share. We all agree this is what we want, but we have also been independant for 7 years now. By the time we actually offiy make the move, I would it if everyone referred to "things" (the house, cars, furniture) as ours instead of mine, his, and hers. Also, if all others feelings were involved in decision making and plans. He and I are already very much working on this one. We sat down with each other's finance over the weekend and make term plans. He and I also discussed what needed to be done to each house and how we were going to get those things done. However, it bothers me very much (even though this is new) when SO refers to "my house" or "my car" or "my -" vs. "our house/car/-" When I bring this up, he graciously admits to understanding and trys harder, but what a ideas on how to ease him and especially our into the "Our/Us" stage instead of the "Me/Mine" stage. Those who know me, this is not a stressor, I am not worried, I have plenty of time to work through all of this. I am just looking for ideas on how to make the transition easier for all involved. I am confident that in the run, things work out beautifully. Just looking for suggestions or ideas to make the transition smoother!! Thanks! eating pussy Jaboatao dos guarapes lookin for some funHis quick claiming the house to me, which is not underwater because I put so much money into it from non marital funds in the beginning, is a big part of it. Plus he has a sizeable retirement from the Navy after 30 years and he's also working a full time civilian job. There is also the indication that the judge allow him to keep his truck (which I paid off for him in 08) or his motorcycle (I paid off his old one at the same time in 08), which he bought 3 months after I paid off his old one with a balance twice what I paid off to begin with after he claimed we needed money. If I have to I rent out 2 of the bedrooms and I get my own retirement from the Reserves, small as it is, in 18 months. Although I am now broke, my mother still has most of her portion of the assets and I am the only surviving sibling so I can count on her if need be. I am also making use of s list and ebay to clear out an overabundance of items and putting all that money away and hidden. I forgot to mention that I paid all the down payments, closing costs, construction closing, binders to builders from before we were even married. He did pay the mortgage and utilities, but I bought my own vehicles, all the food, my clothes lots of his clothes, all pets items, all the furniture, fixtures garden plants, flowers and mulch, my gas, and all medical co pays. We now know that he spent almost 50, at the golf course, and over 50, on the 3 different motorcycles he's bought in the last 3 years. His 3 golf bags have an estimated 10, worth of clubs in them and both his last and current motorcycle is chromned everywhere it can be. He has more to lose than I do in the run .the majority of my feelings right now is how I missed his being bi/- for at least 6 years and yes I've been tested twice so far. latinas date
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