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has really started affecting our marriage. I her so much. We've been married for 18 years now. 2 beautiful almost grown. She's a wonderful mother and a very caring person. The list of meds she takes for her illness is unreal. I fucking hate Xanax, causes people to be in such a fog but if it offers relief then whatever. She has started losing control of her bodily functions at night and as a result, accidents in bed are a frequent occurrence and not just wetting. I would be lying if I said it wasn't a huge turn off. I try to be very supportive and she knows that. I feel so bad for her. We haven't had sex in quite a time. I still her and I tell her everyday and we hug and kiss each other but the intimacy is all but gone. Her physical health is starting to deteriorate as well. She can't work anymore so sits around most of the day. Smokes quite as bit. Hygiene is becoming an issue as well. I don't think I would ever stray but I sure notice some of our female friends more and more. I'm trying very hard to remain faithful. I'm not here hoping someone tell me it's OK. I just need to get this off my chest, can't tell anyone. looking for a local in HarrisburgWe have not talked about D/s roles. I have known him for about 25 years. He used try to emotionally me. He kept me coming back to him, just for sexual gratification though. He is the only guy that ever gave me multiple orgasms. He used his oral skills to have me coming back for more. Because of his abusive nature, I tried to stop seeing him, but the thought of his face between my legs, kept me coming back. At first he did not eat my back door. The first time he did it. I did not like it Thinking about his health. I don't have any diseases, but when someone puts his tong deep inside a butt hole, he is asking for trouble. Because of him being so mean to me in the past. I decided to use him as my fuck toy and ask him to stick his tongue deep inside my butt hole when I "let" him tongue fuck me. Since he is only my fuck and I know he has sex with other women when ever he has a, I use him for my pleasure only and do not let him use his unless like last night, he goes the extra mile, in doing things that in my mind are degrading to him. He is very unfazed by all of this. I do asked him why he does what he does and he says it is to give me pleasure. Well I am hooked, but want to get the D/s dynamic going between him and I. wants for fun and frolic
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