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best friend 28 columbus 28 I apologize for top-posting without having posted much. I have been reading regularly since over a year ago, so I am very familiar with the process. Since this is an forum, filled with strangers, this is whose opinion I would really like at the moment. I want to take a poll. My girlfriend and I had a huge fight this morning. It was a continuation of a discussion we had last night. First, some background. I am in my mid-twenties, she is in her mid/late thirties. (The age difference is only peripheral to this I think). We have been together for about 14 months now. What is important is that, though I have been out to everyone in my life for most of my life, I only came out to my parents about a month after the two of us started dating. They are (as am I) from a different culture (let’s just say it constantly ranks with Saudi Arabia in terms of homophobia) and took it super hard. I am, however, an only, and my parents (especially my dad) me a lot. I know this. This is why, even though it was terribly painful to me do this, we have stayed in contact and have kept out relationship much the same. They told me that they did not want to hear anything about my girlfriend. I obliged, except when asked direct questions. Then I made it clear that she was still in my life and that unless they want to “go there”, they should maybe not ask such questions. I wanted to give them some time, and then slowly start to force the issue. I know that within the next year or so, I would insist that she be accepted and treated with respect, or my relationship with them would suffer. I figured a couple of years is a reasonable amount of time for them to get their bearings. My girlfriend and I were planning to move in together this month, something I did avoid telling my parents. I think they would misunderstand the move to mean that I am engaged to her or something like that (again, cultural) whereas the two of us are just “trying it out”. I her, but I have never lived with someone, and I do have a bit of a commitment issue, so needless to say this is all scary (though also exciting, of course). Bottom line, I did not want the added pressure to this whole situation of dealing with my parents at the same time. I wanted to tell them after we did it, and it worked, and it had been a couple months. married woman in Ofonsi
the larger tendencies on the forum. For instance, I noticely that with a fair amount of consistency, if someone on the forum makes a statement to the effect that a particular woman is hawt or sexy, or they like this or that particular thing, there is a tendency for that person to receive negs or statements to the effect that it is not okay to objectify women. On the other hand, it currently appears that it is okay to say that certain overall categories of women are NOT of personal appeal. So, I guess I am probably missing something, but it seems to me like the following individual statements hold to general forum opinion: 1) It is not okay to talk about how hawt *particular* women are. 2) It is okay to talk about how not-hawt overall groups of women are. So, by these two criteria, would it be okay for me to say that (completely hypothetiy) women do nothing for me? But I could not say that the Icelandic prime minister makes me all tingly? Are those statements acceptable or not when they are reversed? Like could I say that does *not* do it for me but black women *do* do it for me? Is it okay to talk about how ugly specific women are, and how hawt whole groups of women are? I could be wrong, but what I think is actually underlying this is that the statements that tend to fly are the ones that champion underrepresented groups and/or denigrate exalted norms. But statements that put down the underdog are totally uncool. Yea? Nay? couples sex dating Kurrajong Heights
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