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I am a single mom too. I made a choice to end my marriage. Therefore, I must now rely on myself to fix something that is broken. I must rely on myself to put a roof over me and my. I must rely on myself to be able to provide for us if we get sick (health insurance). I must rely on myself to provide for my daughter if I get hit by a truck tomorrow (life insurance). I must rely on myself to make sure the bills are paid on time, that there's always food in the fridge, and that my always knows that they come first in my life. I don't depend on my ex-husband, boyfriend, the state or anyone to make sure these things happen I make sure it happens. That is the result when you choose to end your marriage. The person you were once a team with, is no longer responsible for your well-being, only the well-being of any you have together. So, I don't have a lot of for people, male or female, who wait around for "things to happen" or make excuses why their life isn't the way they want. Unless you are physiy unable, do it yourself. don't depend on anyone but you. That's my outlook and how I live my life right or wrong, it works for me. slut wife KaroolaSo, the other day bf and I had a discussion about $$ and who should pay for what. My point was that, as I do not have an ownership stake in his home (I pay rent), I shouldn't have to pay for things like upkeep and improvements to the home. BF agreed and that was that. But his response didn't sit right with me because it was clear that he hadn't really EVER considered WHEN we might be joining finances, becoming a "team" and, well, committing to togetherness for the term. And me being me, after a day or two of worrying/wondering about it, I broached the subject of term togetherness with BF. Frankly, I thought we HAD committed to that when we agreed to move in together, but that BF needed a few months to make sure that, under the same roof, we all worked well together. He and I are very, very happy with each other. He told me, when I couldn't stop myself from raising the issue of "what about the, term do you us together? Is that what you want?" that I was the best thing to ever happen to him and that he didn't want to "push me away" with his failure to act/plan for the future. He can't quite articulate just WHAT he needs or wants for the future. He just keeps saying that he's not accustomed to thinking about his future and that doing so makes him very anxious (he has anxiety issues anyway). From my point of view, at this point in our relationship, seeing a future together should fill him with happiness, not anxiety. He's going to make an appt with his therapist to if he can work through his issues. In the meantime, I'm not sure what to do. I am afraid of what the therapy turn up, but that's not rational if the therapy reveals some deep-seated crap, it's better to know that now, right? If it's just not ever going to happen, I need to know that, too. I feel very passive right now, but I've stated my piece and need to let him figure out HIS plans and desires. I don't think there's anything I can do. I guess I'm just anxious where, a week ago, I would have said I was feeling very secure. Damn. totally free sex dating
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