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ca65 hang tonight gas lamp"This really hurts me" and leave it at that. Providing you happen to run into her that is. I would stop going to the clubs and find a new friendship pool certainly. The other thing I would do is read, read, read. I've not been in AA but I've attended Al-Anon meetings and the prior suggestions are valid. I'd also read novels, just for fun and to get some distance from this situation. The reality is you are hurting. Not only from the divorce but from a friend that you trusted. Sadly, life changes and you have no control over how others behave. Your control is over your own behavior so make positive changes. Start walking before or after work. Find a place to volunteer at. Change from alcohol to lemonade or juice. Drink more water. Enjoy doing what you want to do but couldn't do when married. Find your own hobbies that don't involve listening to him play music. Read for your own enjoyment. A book take you to a different situation, time and place. Mostly, it change your focus from you to the book, at least while reading. It's all healing and you'll one day be fine with their friendship or relationship. Actually, you might just feel "whatever" when they each other because you'll be past it. Good luck. looking for passion
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The advice I got from my first post was basiy what are you waiting for. Every comment directed me to speak or act out on things. I took that advice to heart. It was I who then chose the means. I read this second thread again. My posts seemed strange to me. people ed them fiction. I agree in a way. Deliberately telling things as a story was itself a kind of lie. Reading both threads now I several things I did not before. It is painful but helps. I do not feel as numb. The best comment to me was that I am not worthy of my friend. I know that is obvious but I sometimes need to hear the obvious said by someone. I am thinking the comment did not go far enough. It would be better to say that I am not worthy of anything at all. I need to become invisible. On the laughing at me thing I did not understand. Maybe those people were not grown. Some here might be teenagers. I would like to laugh. Wish there was a way to laugh. small bbw just turned 21
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