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honest about the fact that you have exhibited controlling behavior as this helps to understand why she would need to set such a clear boundary, especially concerning. To hear you exclaim you "should be a close 2nd, all the time!" shows that controlling behavior very clearly. Can you recognize this? It might help you to get some counseling to clarify where your control issues stem from and how to manage them more effectively. It is easy to get stuck in our behavior and not "-" it clearly. We need others to help us it. bbw sbf real nsa or fwbMy GF and I have been together for almost 3 years now. She pushed for us to move in together, which I eventually went for because we were together all the time. She also really wanted to get engaged. It took me over a year to get completely comfortable with the idea but I finally did and planned on proposing this christmas. That is until she wrote me a note and essentially told me that she does not want to live together next year, she does not want to get engaged anytime, and gave me a laundry list of things I need to improve on if I want a ltr with her. I agree with a lot of the things she wants me to improve on, they are really in my best interest and it's nothing petty. She also wants me to a therapist because a lot of my problems stem from anxiety and my severe pessimism. But since the note, about 3 weeks ago, I can't help but be angry with her. I'm not sure if I'm angry with her or with myself, or if I'm trying to improve myself for me or for her. Or maybe I'm just reeling from having a future I was sure of just yanked out from under my feet. Sorry for the post, if anyone even read to this point, thank you. I just needed to throw this out there, even if no one hears it. lonely ladys
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