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Infidelity and divorce are extremely painful. It's not crazy to still have some lasting effects from such an awful experience. But those are reasons for your trust issues, not excuses. It's not fair for your current wife to pay the price for your former one. I think you need to own that these are your issues, but also be honest with your mate. Make sure she KNOWS you are struggling with YOUR OWN trust issues and that YOU know she hasn't given you any reason to doubt her. Ask for her openness, trust her fidelity, but open the conversation so that she can tell YOU if you are over stepping your bounds. It might be worth having a conversation about what is okay and not okay between you. For instance, can you have lunch w/ a member of the opposite sex? Is it okay to look at each others phones? (and realize that if she doesn't like the thought of you going in her phone, it DOESN'T necessarily mean she's hiding something) Couples have very different standards for these kinds of things. The more you two are on the same and the more you communicate with each other, the more trust you build. older pussy in Ban Khlong Nai
There are so descriptions and debates out there regarding where someone falls on the sexual identity continuum. Is it what you do or what you think? Is it how you act or how you are? From my perspective, there are as ways to refer to human interactions as there are humans. As one definition states: (OR capitalized for emphasis.) Bisexuality is sexual behavior OR an orientation involving physical OR romantic attraction to males and females, especially with regard to men and women. There are folks out there who have sexual interactions with people of the same gender, yet refer to themselves as straight, just as there are people who self-identify as a particular sexual orientation yet haven't ever had a sexual experience with another. Be safe, enjoy, and keep talking about where you're at. That's what I say. california man seeking noncalifornia womanFantasy ones? Because that's what this one is. Hoo boy talk about taking all your fantasies and dreams and lasering them on one person!!! How do you go from a few nice comments to "oh, my God, I'm so in with my soul mate!" that you've never even been in the same ROOM with? No one can keep up a fantasy indefinitely, which is what happened here. She's finally showing you her true self, in spades. There's a REASON why she's had a series of bad relationships, ok, and it's not just 'bad luck'. You think she's been honest with you? You think you've been honest with HER? It's IMPOSSIBLE for you both to be truly honest with each other unless you are sitting face to face, staring into each other's eyes, and reading the body language that screams open or closed. You are both writers words are your stock in trade but relationships are about emotions, and how you interact with other human beings, not just, "honest" words. Everyone lies either through intent or sheer unawareness of their own feelings/emotions/expectations. When you are talking to someone you have never met, at a distance, you can be the person you wish you were urbane, witty, self-aware, intellectual, insightful, blah, blah, blah. But until you can how the other person interacts with the rest of the world, all you are seeing is a carefully constructed fantasy. Sorry she got her feelings hurt, but you know, maybe it's time to get some real-life experience with real people and REAL relationships to write about, instead of fantasy ones. Give it a break, get some perspective, and stop obsessing over a fantasy. lonely women
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