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I wouldn't bat an eye at an added service charge. There are very few places in the US who have them, but the few who do in Seattle are dividing the charge more equitably between the front of the house and the kitchen, which goes a way in addressing the disparity in pay between the two. Any service issues would be something I'd take to the manager on duty, albeit with some informed observation first. And all that said, having just survived a truly hellacious job, I can say with certainty that most problems stem from inadequate training and support, rather than personal failings on the servers themselves. I saw quite clearly our servers were understaffed and blamed by the chef for the problems caused by understaffing. Of course I felt bad for the customers, we did our best to send out complimentary plates of stuff, but enough from above certainly lead to a server's attitude of not giving a shit. The veteran pros would prefer not to feel that way, but it definitely got to a point where it became a matter of self-protection at the expense of the customer. I got to that point as well a few times, hence my comment about informed observation: I can smell fear in a restaurant, and I can figure out in a glance what's going on in terms of staffing and training. For the sake of not bringing extra trouble, I might choose to either keep quiet or ask a sympathetic and carefully worded question first before making a complaint. The best choice well be to simply not come back. My experience is obviously well outside the curve though, I doubt the average patron would pick up on any of this, nor would I expect them to. horny local girl in DofteanaI just read the thread in W4W, and you got as good advice as is likely on any forum. Time for you to move on. Reflect on your feelings, there is something to be learned there, but move on. I have often fallen for a beautiful, gracious, person. Yeah, the eyes usually get me, the tone of voice. But the fact is, it is not about me. These are people who feel secure in their beings and are willing to be open and look you directly in the eye. She is secure in who she is, and so she can look directly at you, and you fall in, and fall apart. Learn from her. don't try to attach yourself to her. adult relationship
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