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For what it's worth, when I was newly sober at age 23 back in , there were so women, and straight, that I was attracted to in Alcoholics. I felt so ugly inside and out and was so immensely touched by these women who cared more for my life and sanity than my approval. Just a hug or a touch on the arm and I was, so I thought, "in -" not really even knowing what was. One day I shared with my sponsor, "-, I met HER, I met the woman I want to share my life with!" and started going on and on about this woman. "-," my sponsor replied, "we've had this conversation before." Puzzled for a moment than realizing my sponsor's poor recollection I replied, "No, THAT was, THIS is -!" proud informing her of her confusion. "-, it's just a different name" she responded and continued, "whenever you're attracted to someone just be her friend and BECOME the woman YOU want to share your life with." For 24 years, my journey of becoming the woman I want to share my life with continues. Throughout this journey, I have met so amazing and beautiful people, men and women, and straight. So of them have left their footprints on my heart and in doing so, have changed me forever. So of them taught me courage, not so much by what they said but rather, by the power of their example. For me, uncovering, discovering and discarding those old ideas allows room for new ones. I no longer feel so ugly on the inside that I don't care what I look like on the outside. I have learned that is a verb and that if I want something, give it first. It is and has been an amazing journey. I wouldn't be where I am now if it weren't for being allowed to ask questions. Those who mind don't matter; those who matter don't mind. Thank you for your posts; thank you for exemplifying courage; thank you for your perserverance here on despite the "how dare you ask such questions" scolding replies. Continue to go where the is and go where the strength is and if you're inclined, become the woman you want to share your life with for in becoming her, you attract her~ cock suckers Cahaba HeightsI think it fulfills a persons need to feel that they are powerful and can effect someone. If someone was a loser before you met them and they improved in life you can attribute that to them being with you. logiy or not thats how humans rationalize it. If they are already a well put together person there its no potential for that need to get fulfilled. Thus you are not as attractive to them if they have a strong drive in this power need. This its generally defined as co-dependence. Or having or needing to use someone to get your own internal needs met. Your ex had an early experience that made her feel very powerless so she is doing her best to try and get that need met any way she can. No matter how times someone tells her there is no pot of gold at the end of that road this is that only way she can think of to get the need met. cupid dating
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