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1) you deliberately answered the OP's question in a way that was bound to confuse the issue. she was asking about sexual frequency, which was obviously intended to include all lovemaking. 2) you used the OP's question as yet another excuse to brag about your marriage. OP did not come on here to ask about your relationship, but her own. so you're being an attention whore. 3) you haven't met Dax or gotten the slightest clue what his marriage is like. I have, and it's apparently happier and more committed than most. you have some serious balls trying to pass judgment on whether anyone -'s marriage is "true" or not, just because it's been open for a small fraction of its length. 4) you could not point to any post where Dax has suggested opening up a troubled marriage as a cure for what ails it. he has always maintained that a lot of honesty and work are required to keep a polyamorous relationship. it's no band-aid fix. 5) people who are truly happy and secure in their relationships tend not to brag so hard. perhaps you should be concerned that people think "the doth protest too much" and refrain from some of the posturing. local horney CollinwoodFirst of all, talk to an attorney and figure out where you stand if you file for divorce. An attorney can make suggestions as to how to gather evidence you'll need, financial arrangements, etc. (PS: You can put a simple keystroke recorder on your computer without his knowledge, if you want to try to snag the password for the phone account.) Once you have information, then it's time for a talk. Tell him that his behavior the staying out all night, the phone behavior is that of someone having an affair. He'll protest, but just tell him that actions speak louder than words, and the fact that he has changed passwords so that you can't even pay the on-line was the final nail in the coffin. don't argue about it take it as a given. I think your instincts are right, unfortunately. Tell him, again, calmly, that 1) until he has been to a doctor and been checked out for STDs, sex is off the table, and 2) marriage counseling starts next week. If he isn't willing to do these things to pull your marriage together there's your answer, and you need to start making arrangements for a divorce. Sorry, but for me, once the trust is gone, I'm gone, too. I can't have an intimate relationship without trust. ladies looking men
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