Where are you? I hate this baby. I'm so close to you now but my heart wants to give up. I've read so many books since your last letter I wrote, about Soulmates and The condition of the Soul. It has really enlightened me alot but at the same time taught me something I already knew in my heart, that everyone does have a other half. Im getting where I can't search anymore baby. I go out and get drunk to numb the pain of not having you to love but that only makes it worse, I end up home alone crying myself to sleep. It always seems like a good idea to begin with though. Now that I moved you must be close though because I feel you everywhere I go, the breeze blows my direction and I can smell this divine scent that fills me with thoughts and emotions like no other womans smell could. Its like my soul instantly knows that its you. I still see you in my dreams and sometimes wake up expecting to see you beside me but your not there, problem is it has gotten worse now. Are you close? Is that why this stigmata is happening to me? Its gotten so strong now I cant take it, every morning your still not beside me sleeping sweetly and every night I cry to my pillow which cuts into me deeper and deeper, it pains me like no other. My friends tell me that maybe giving up is what it takes but they don't understand me. So much love built up inside and only one woman to give it too. If only you were here they would understand then. However giving up sounds easier and easier as the lonely days pass. If I didnt have this opportunity to let these feelings out in these letters I have no idea what condition I would be in. The feelings build up so strong and like a balloon im ready to burst, then I either get drunk or write, or both. How much longer this can go on I don't know, im going to either die drowning my heartache or find you and satisfy my souls longing to be whole. Hopefully the latter. I just dont understand why I hear your voice at night and smell you so much more now. What are yo Array Joinville cock funDinner and Drinks Tonite It's another beautiful day in San Diego and I would like to take advantage of it. Looking for someone to go have dinner and drinks. We can take a nice drive to the beach and hit up some bars. Hope to hear from you soon. old swingers in Le Genevey hot tranny
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When I met him I weighed in a short span of living here I weighed. Intimacy dropped off to once a month. He was staying at work later to avoid me. I was never a mean spirited, spiteful or naggy person. But lacked clear priorities! He never paid bills on time. We struggled daily to get by because I'm on disability. I thought if I just talked about stuff got him to things clearly he would understand. He drunkenly ed me a condescending bitch one night in his first attempt at true communication. I realized I was being and nasty and I hated myself for it. I started changing not doing all those things. He didn't change. Then last month I woke up with a lump under my nose and he without much warning left for the weekend to go skiing. Great we hadn't done something fun together in a year and a half :-(. I go to the doctor and 2 hours later half of my face swells 3x bigger! I was miserable in pain and alone. He showed no concern when the doctor found mold in the swab culture. The next few days I would get hives, ringworm, athletes foot, yeast infections, thrush, my skin started to flake, my hair fell out, and then my ankles and feet wrists and hands became twice their normal size. It took a professional mold guy to tell him the bathroom had mold again, his attic was water damaged so bad that mold is likely in all the rooms upstairs, and the heat pump is no longer working. I had Aspergilosis or Humidifier Lung. Nothing has been done to fix it yet we can't afford it. I him but I can't understand him? What am I doing to him that makes him act the way he does? He puts friends or work in a category above me and his pets (his home). I asked this to me and if he didn't me he would have said no but he said yes. So why do I get this robot behavior? lonely women Camelford
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