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In order to even meet a again I'm going to need him to present an original birth certificate, driver's license, credit report, tax returns for the last 5 years, a background report am I missing anything? How am I gonna get all that stuff without spilling the beans? Seriously how am I ever supposed to trust anyone again? I knew him for a year and a half and I never had a clue. I didn't even know his real NAME. NOT EVEN HIS NAME! I wrote him letters while we were apart and gave him Christmas cards for his family addressed to, you know, "The Jones Family" when their last name was.. Smith. The fact that our relationship was so emotionally based confuses me the most. If he loved me so much how could he have ever let it get this far if he didn't have bad intentions from the start? The thought of him sleeping with me, and now realizing he was driving home to his wife and sleeping with her it makes me feel ill. The I knew would never do that. The I knew had not had sex in 5 years because he didn't believe in sex outside of a relationship and he hadn't dated in that because he had been betrayed, cheated on during an engagement. It was a HUGE deal for me to be intimate with him because I have an history. He KNEW that. And he knew I had issues with depression and had been suicidal before and he pursued me anyway. He never thought, oh shit I can't fuck this one up . he pounced on it instead and told me he understood and would support me and protect me. He'd cook me dinner while I was at my group therapy. Basiy talking about what a great guy he was. Are you kidding me??? Bridgeport New Jersey free sexOK .divorced over a year (her wishes), separated for 3 years (traumatic separation, my fault). wonderful, house, pool, picket fence, volvo (i'm kidding about the volvo). We are both hard working professionals. No substance or health issues. We have been in this "mending" mode since the separation. Neither of us has dated other people. I am in an apt., paying support, the whole drill. Here's the bottom line. I have been very clear of my wishes to put this relationship back together and for us both to start living under the same roof again. We have been to couples counseling, wrote letters, phone s, dates, no dates, done everything except stand upside down and do the two step. She is still not able to say "yes, move back in and lets proceed". I am at the end of my rope and really feel it's time to start settling in to a new life. It's very scary to think of ending this but the writing appears to be on the wall. She tells me she loves me more than anyone in the world and to give her more time. I can't really hear that anymore, and believe it, as I remain the "outsider". I want sincere answers, not scolding. I am a good person, work hard, and did not plan on falling for another woman in this life. Here's the questions; Is there life after divorce? and/or Is it possible to have a thriving relationship with an ex after an affair? I am particularly interested in hearing from the females of the crowd. Again, I have been scolded and beat up already, I am looking for intelligent advice. horny granny
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