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I think a lot of these problems are compounded in same sex relationships. "Both of those problems are because we think we have to be something we're not. Women are taught that there's some sort of higher moral ground in hating sex. Men are pressured into a lot of sexual conquests, even if they're more comfortable with one partner." People joke about lesbian bed death. It happens in all relationships, reguardless of the gender of the partners, but if you have two people who are socialized into denying sexual desires, and have had natural sexual agression subverted, you probably have unsatisified partners. As for the men wanting a committed partner, a family, or a domestic-centered life is viewed by some activists as a complete sellout to hetero-centric societal norms. They say "You don't have to live that way." Sure, but what if you want to? Not to mention how difficult it seems to be for some of them to risk emotional exposure. Guys tell me their bad bf stories, and except for problems, this seems to be the biggest relationship killer out there. black girls and sex with contactsMy GF and have had a disagreement about a subject recently and we both feel the other is being unreasonable. We have been together for several years and each other very much. About six months ago, I shared with her I had an affair with a co-worker before we were together. A fling,no emotional ties. The affair was wrong, my marriage is over and I have come to terms with the affair. (This is not about the affair; the affair is behind me and before her, not the issue we are here for help with.) My GF was not thrilled with the news. This topic came backup after 6 months becuase of a talk about double standards. Here is the sticking point. GF and I have separate accounts. In the past I have expressed problems with her being friends with ex-BFs and the occasional too friendly creep that post too much on her account. After telling her it bothered me she those friends. I also an ex-GF, but I left the co-worker. I don’t her as an ex, just an old fling. There is nothing between us and we still work together. My GF, who used to work with us, doesn’t like the idea of us being friends, or other since learning of the fling. Looking back on the time we all worked together, she feels the co-worker was still too interested in me. I insist there is nothing between us now. She asked that I unfriend the co-worker but I’d rather not. Instead I have agreed to block the co-worker from appearing on my wall, commenting or liking any of her posts and I told GF she could have my password. My GF doesn't understand why I'm so stubborn about not removing her and finds my resolve unsettling. I feel she should trust in me there is nothing between me and my co-worker now and there never be. I find it unfair she would ask me to unfriend someone I work with. It could possibly create an awkward work environment with this person I every day. Should other co-workers notice I've unfriended the fling co-worker, they find it odd. GF feels it’s disrespectful and inconsiderate considering she her ex’s and her feelings aren't being considered. We ask those here, are both of us right, or both wrong? What is the middle ground? Am I justified and is she justified? How do we get past this unwanted drama? amature encounters
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