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Here's the thing: You can't just pluck one thing out of the air and pass judgement on your BF's entire financial management without giving us a little more background. If $ is a negligible amount to him, then you don't get to judge. IF he has savings, isn't in debt up to his eyeballs and is generally fairly responsible then he can spend his money any damn way he pleases. It's not your place to "approve" of what he spends his money on, in that case. Do I think $ is silly for a pair of casual sneakers for ANYONE? Sure. I wouldn't pay it, I'm not really a fashionista, but I don't begrudge anyone paying, IF THEY CAN AFFORD IT. (I have to admit, I once saw a pair of Louboutins that completely entranced me but couldn't bring myself to spend $ on a pair of shoes. That's MY choice. It certainly doesn't stop some people!) However, I did pay $ for soccer shoes for my one year he was playing on a club/travel team, and he wears a size 15 hard to find even regular shoes, much less well-fitting soccer shoes (and they HAVE to fit, the way those had to change direction on a dime.) He took care of them, kept 'em clean and even conditioned them occasionally. He appreciated them. Does your BF's appreciate the shoes? Or does he just toss 'em aside like last week's paper? Do a backcheck and make sure that your own financial and romantic history isn't coloring your judgement on your boyfriend's spending habits. You grew up poor. OK, yeah, a lot of people did. Growing up poor doesn't make you morally superior. (Neither does growing up, but that's another story.) I can why you might be nervous, especially if your ex was not fisy responsible. You say that he likes to spend money, but again DOES HE HAVE IT TO SPEND? If you and he co-mingle your finances, then you might want to consider taking a financial management class together, such as Ramsey's Financial Peace (take the 13-week seminar, it's more powerful than the on-line offerings, because it's harder to duck behind rationalizations. :-) It's a great program for getting partners on the same, financially, and helping them organize their financial goals in sensible ways. lonely mom Kayaru
if this relationship has been soured for a time, I'm guessing you really have your heart set on a great relationship with a great guy. A great guy isn't going to be open to this situation. And, you can't have a great relationship with anything less than a great guy, right? So. Get your ducks in a row. Handle your business, and don't go on the prowl until you can choose to share yourself with exactly what pleases you rather than what be willing to accept you. good luck. horny black ssbbwi want a pony, but so far one hasn't appeared. she locked him out bc SHE wanted total control of the marital property ("marital property = half his"), and all of her backpedaling about how there "was an RO, just hadn't been served yet" is bs. she had NO RIGHT to lock him out without an RO or a judge ruling on it him being served. he's on the lease, it's his place, too. had he been evicted? no. now she's bellyaching because she didn't have her ducks all in a row before she surprised him locked him out. too bad. until someone with the legal authority to do so officially told him he was not allowed in the apartment, he was allowed. i don't blame him one bit for breaking in. online dating match
kayan Wynyard chat rooms all lined up in a row. But maturity would also be acknowledging that not everything in your life is ever going to go according to plan. In fact, whatever deity you believe in laughs at you the moment you even suggest that you've got the slightest inkling that you're going to make a plan in life. While your parents married at 16 and are still together is almost proof that this sort of thing is possible, you also have to remember that your parents come from a different time period. Your parents don't come from a time that encourages people to act irresponsible or immature. Your parents come from a time period where the majority of people got married straight out of high school instead of going to college. Now? It's not the norm to get married in your teens or straight out of college. Most people are encouraged to go to college instead of just getting married and becoming factories. You can't the future. You can't know for sure what is going to happen to you. You never definitely know for certain that neither you, nor your GF are ever going to want to live the lifestyle of an irresponsible adult in their early twenties. Like I said in my earlier response. Wait. If you two are supposed to be together you are going to grow and mature together that only affirm your bond. The stats are stacked against you in this situation. 80% of people who get married before the age of 22 end up divorced. Do you want to become a statistic? You're, you have your whole life ahead of you. What's waiting just a few more years? fuck dates Little rock ny
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