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Sheesh You would think that those in the community who know what it's like to be feared and hated for being different would be *more* understanding of others who are different. I guess I'm an idealist. TECHNICALLY (in my understanding anyway) anyone who's ever had a same sex experience is a "homosexual". That's way too simplistic to apply to all people on earth. Exclusive homosexuality is one of the only things that separates humans from other (- are actually bisexual) so I'd say it's interesting that there are people out there who are completely. In some social circles, labelling yourself as bi is much more acceptable than being, whereas in the -/lesbian community, being bisexual amounts to being an attention whore and a liar. So what to do? Seems like a dumb idea to label oneself just to please a bunch of morons on the internet. People aren't. We're complex and dynamic and human sexuality is still shrouded in mystery If you're going to make at least one group of people mad no matter what, does it make sense to pretend to be one thing or another? Get off your high horse, internet people. bored seeking local adult marrieds funI just had my first 3 weeks ago, so totally get the 'I feel like an asexual whale' thing. And I warn you, it's about to get a whole lot less sexy. First, you can't have sex for 6 weeks post birth. And on top of that, no sleep, infrequent showers, leaky boobs, stomach pooch, and birth images permanently seared into his mind. So, yeah, wise to work on none sexual ways to feel close. You might want to just have a conversation about that. Approach it like a problem to be solved. "Babe, I know sex is important to you what are we going to do when the comes?" I also understand what it's like to be with a less than romantic partner. I my DH completely, but he's just not the flowers and chocolate kind of guy. It use to bug the hell out of me. First, I had to really think about how important that was to me. DH is very good to me, so did I really need him to prove it in that way? I had to let it go a bit. The second part was being SUPER clear about my expectations. Things like '-, my birthday is coming up. I'd like to go to x restaurant and don't forget that lilies are my favorite flower!' Yes, it's not romantic to plan your own stuff, but it sure beats being disappointed. Then when he follows through, be very appreciative. The more DH got a feel for what I like, and saw how happy it made me, he started to take a lot more initiative. Lastly, don't put yourself out so much! Yes, I understand having sex because you want to please your mate, but don't have sex you really don't want to. That's only going to lead to resentment. I'm not saying withhold, but you need to make you desires matter at least on equal footing to his! Good luck. Congrats on the -! free online dating service
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