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Trainer at my gym. Hot as all hell, but in a "guy next door" kind of way. My gaydar went off upon first meeting him in a group workout class. Avoided each other for months HECK! I didn't even know his name! Then one day he comes up to me and addresses me by name ??? Asked if I have ever had a fitness test. Surprised when told him no. We schedule one. I give some racy answers. He tells me a lot about his personal life like he's married. I shrug it off as a sales pitch and that my gaydar (although still there) was wrong. He seems to always be around when I'm working out. He seems to walk through the locker room when I'm only in a towel or in my underwear. For the first time when I'm there HE is in the locker room, HE is going to take a shower!!! Me, trying to be non-plussed look out the corner of my eye and him in his boxers BUT he wraps his towel around himself to take underwear off. He walks by me and speaks so far, so good, I'm cool. Its when he comes out of the shower and looks me dead in my eyes as he walks towards me that kind of un-nerves me. Then he touches me with his wet hands and says; "If I don't you later have a good night." Gaydar is absolutely out of control now!!! Am I misreading this? What's the next move? big black meat for Canoas femalesI run a parent support program for a very at risk population. I deal with a lot of these issues, including issues around incarceration. First, I would NOT bring him to dad in jail. A going through this much needs routine and stability more than anything. Not spanking, not lengthy extreme punishment, not leaping from sport to sport. R-O-U-T-I-N-E. He need to know what to expect, and this takes time and a heck of a lot of from you. For most, it takes at LEAST 10x of repeating a behavior until it's internalized (and if you slip up, it's like you are starting from scratch), but for a with ADHD and ODD, it's going to take more. Jumping from thing to thing only teaches him that if he causes enough grief, you'll give up that strategy, ensuring that he'll do it again. I would highly recommend the video 1-2-3 Magic. Even if you don't go with that particular strategy (though I've seen it work wonders for some tough -) it has some great parenting tips. When I extreme behavior cases, there are a few area we always look at positive reinforcement (there should be at LEAST 4 to 1 positive to negative communication), routine, diet and exercise. You wouldn't BELIEVE how much behavior issues are tied to diet and exercise. If he isn't getting at least and hour a day of sweaty, breathing hard play, while eating a good diet and cutting out sugar, it be nearly impossible to make any additional headway. But the most important factor here is you. YOU need to feel stable and calm and in control and that sounds really difficult while trying to raise a with special needs on your own. I you seek out support join a parenting support group, get a good counselor, a parenting hotline, make some time for yourself. You need to take care of yourself to best take care of him. free internet dating
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