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Regardless of whether he knew her back in the day or not, she's "fresh meat" at the new school. I teach high school, and any time a new girl, especially a freshman girl, steps foot in the school it's like a bunch of male dogs with a female dog in heat. He's not there for comfort, he's there to stake out his territory and guarantee he's made it clear at school that she's his property already. High school senior boys do not pick 14 y/o girls as girlfriends for a connection, it's a trophy thing and gives him bragging rights. There is almost no such thing as just dating in high school anymore. If they're a couple, they're going to have some form of sexual interaction. He talk about it to his friends, and she'll have a reputation before the end of the school year. She's moved here for a fresh start, and you need to help guide her to make choices that help her succeed. This is one that her dad needs to talk to her about and he needs to tell it straight. All boys think about sex, they think about it all the time, and they don't have the emotional connection to it like girls do. She needs to get the and validation from her father, and regardless of the reasons for him not being able to be a part of her life for several years, that is a huge contributor to how she interacts with boys now and later in her life. I would sit down as with her and have a discussion about giving herself time to transition. She needs to focus on doing well in school, getting involved in activities, and making friends not having a boyfriend. If I were you, I'd make it clear, making sure to have her feel like she's got a voice in all of it, that WE need to work on reconnecting as a family and learning to live together again, and to leave this type of distraction until later. You do need to end this "relationship" immediately. She's only been there for a short time, so it's not like you're banning her from seeing someone she's been with for a time. And as some others have said, if she does push the limits, sneak out, or whatever, then follow through with meaningful and consistent consequences. any swingers in the keys
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