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So, I totally know what you are saying because I've been in the same boat! I think my own sinking feeling came in the my late 20's. I've always been independently minded, never seeking marriage until all my single girlfriends started pairing off and disappearing off the social map. It's been my experience that "just live your life and you'll ending meeting a great guy" DOES NOT WORK! :) Really. First, you gotta be honest with yourself. Are you truly happy just being single? OR, do you want to find someone for a LTR? If you want to find someone., actively date, trust me, that won't happen with just "living your life". You need to go after it with the same energy and planning you devote to getting your career off the ground. Let everyone know you are looking and be willing to be set up on dates. You'd be surprised what nice, successful, and down to earth guys your secretary knows, or a friend of a friend knows. Join e or. There's no better way to meet people outside of your field or outside of your social circle. Go to speed dating. OMG, I thought that was totally desparate, until I went. First, you feel really attractive because the ratio for guys to girls is like 3 to 1. Second, the guys are totally normal and cool they just want to get out there too. Find activities you enjoy and meet guys with like interests. Even if you don't end up meeting the "one", you end up with an active dating life, which is rewarding in itself. And actually, I think you end up finding someone. 'Cause I did. :) hot wv women looking for men- asexual and kinkless, which shifted to radical lesbian feminist separatist and kinkless (you know, where orgasms come from the bliss of imagining a utopia populated by women holding hands and singing near and ferron songs in perfect -), which shifted to lesbian feminist submissive in training (extreme yet extremely desexualized immersion into the world of bdsm; submission and dissociation went hand-in hand, so submission could take on a very performative feel; NB: dissociation went hand-in-hand with all sorts of benign, day-to-day things), which shifted to longterm kinkless and monogamous lesbian relationship, which shifted to immersion in trauma recovery work and celibacy with everyone other than myself, which included a great deal of fantasy work, which then shifted to kinkless sexual exploration with men, which shifted to hardcore and heavily sexual D/s relationship/exploration/experiences with a in which i learned to identify and seek and engage the pursuit/satisfaction of pleasure (idiosyncratiy bundled in physical, metal and emotional terms), and which served to burn away the last lingering effects of trauma that no amount of talk therapy would ever touch, which led to a sense of independence, womanliness, curiosity and sexual agency wherein i am most keenly turned on by the thought of thoroughly kinked up play that falls outside the rubric of D/s power exchange. so. in hypercompressed sum: the thoroughly imbricated, non-causal, ourobourotic relationship between the complete shaking up of the sno-globe of my erotic/sexual orientation/identification/attractions and years of hardcore digging around in the muck of my psyche to eradicate or transmute every last shred of evidence of trauma-born terror. must launch into my day, check back later hot teens
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