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First you said: To say that getting emotional after witnessing a physical assualt on an innocent third party is overreacting is just plain silly. Overreacting is acting. That means acting on your anger. But now you seem to be saying she wasn't acting angry because she was calm. But that's not what you said; you were speaking in the abstract. Why being abstract? Then you bring up this: So in your world repressing emotions is the way to go? You are claiming she was calm so why mention repressing emotions? That doesn't make any sense. I never said: Getting angry, an emotion, is the same as getting violent, an action? I said this: Talking about how you feel is not expressing it, it's discussing it. You would not respond to this: So you agree that getting angry is not appropriate; the way to handle BF is to discuss it rationally without getting angry. Why didn't you say that she was calm and rational then? Because that would mean you agree with me? You can claim I am wrong all you want but I have said the same thing consistently. Getting angry in response to anger or violence is wrong. (I limited my comments to her behavior.) She asked if she was wrong. If she was calm then there would be no reason for her to ask if she was wrong. When someone blows their cool they sometimes question if they were wrong; but no one ever doubts themselves when they have kept a cool head. Having a cool head means you have our intellect making decisions (not your emotions). You said she was lying in another post but you believe that she was calm with him. That doesn't make sense to me. Why would she need to lie here if she is capable of handling a violent BF with a cool head? You are not being consistent in your point of view. Langley-on-Tyne guy looking for live in companion
If I was you wife's attorney or the judge I would have you dancing like a puppet. Here's where you are off the rails you know you're broken to a point, but oh, your honor, I'm not THAT broken. You have already provided your stbx with the ammo she needs to drag you down by requiring anger management in the first place. She's got the leverage and she's using it. The only way to combat this at this point is to actually perform the function with the right goal in mind, fixing your fucked up mindset and controlling your anger. A complete surrender on the point with therapy in place, attending classes and also .results. Make the point moot. Your attorney is right, KneeScraper is right (though he's wrong on the "most" part), the system is fucked up and gains a profit, even from innocent parties, women use this card unjustly in some cases and the worst part..all they have to do is to point to people with your mindset to have the ammo they need. And yeah, living with or even being around a person with real anger issues really is that bad. anyone up for nsa fun tonightBut being in a logical mode allows me to be well, logical. I don't ACT key word there, ACT in a manner that would potentially damage any leverage I might have or make a statement that could be used against me later on. It's NOT too late to start and why the fuck do you want to get a reaction from her? DUDE she's leaving. I know it hurts but that isn't going to change what's going on. You're adding to your pain there's enough already so quit it. What's gained from it? a path to a quicker resolution of issues and a final divorce. knowing you faced down this event without striking out in bitterness and anger Understanding that you didn't let your feelings get in the way of the best possible solution you could get your. eliminating the unknowns and reducing your stress for the HAUL and last but not least you said it all, "I hate being that way" You want to look back on this and be able to say 'well she fucked me over'? or would you prefer to get to a place where this happened to you but you somehow got through it and built a better life? don't know if this makes sense but emotions have to catch up to the action. You do the right things, work hard, improve yourself and your life and THEN you start feeling better and stronger. You try to feel better so you can improve and you'll have a much longer and more difficult recovery. Puttin your emotions aside help you do that. free text sex chat
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