The Impossible Friend w4w So this post will be long and most people wont even read it. Because its completely absurd. Basiy Im looking for a friend, but its a lot more than that. Im picky, or so Im realizing. And Im not perfect. In fact, Im pretty fucked up. Im probably not everything you want in a friend. But hell, Im HERE. And I have time for you. Im lonely and Im bored. So anyway, lets get on with it.
Before I begin, Id like to say that Im a fantastic human being and a great friend.. really. You'll have a hard time believing that about halfway through this post so I'll just state it up front and you can come back to this first part if you need to be reminded.
So heres what Im looking for in a friend:
You really need to be between jacket. You should be interested in spontaneity and you should me to do spontaneous things often. It would be nice if you came up with a lot of these spontaneous things on your own, and it would be even nicer if you did the driving. I like to be the passenger.
You should be a right brained person and have some sort of creative talent that you don't peruse because you believe you are not good enough. Don' worry, I'll help you with that. You should also appreciate my paintings and encourage me to paint more often.
When its dinner time and we are out I would prefer you just tell me where you want to eat rather than asking me what I want. Unless of course I know what I want. But typiy I don't, so you should have knowledge of all the local restaurants and be okay with ing the shots. I need you to not sit around and wait for me to make up my mind.
Oh, and once a month Im a total disaster. I usually cry a lot for no reason, and say that Im going to quit my job or kill myself. You should be okay with listening to me every month and not try to make it better or tell me I need to go to a mental hospital.
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- taught using parables. Thought I would give it a try. THE PARABLE OF THE RED BUTTON When I press the big red button it makes a funny sound. I learned that by trial and error. Now when I press the big red button it makes a funny sound, but I get annoyed. Did the button change? Did the sound change? Does that make this easier to understand? THE PARABLE OF THE WIGGLY FINGERS Patient: "Doc, every time I wiggle my fingers my arm hurts." Doc: "Stop wiggling your fingers" to the woman who emailed me wondering
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