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still looking for that somebody going thru a very tough time, just need to vent/get things off my chest. i've reached bottom. my husband i've been going thru a rough time 4 the last yr. (been together for almost 16yr/married for 18 mos. known each other since we were 15). we tried talking/working it out. been thru it all together. i've tried to be on his it thru his eyes. i my hub w/all my heartsoul, so affection/-, encouragement/praise were easily shown by me. i always felt so at least. he begs to differ. i cooked, cleaned, laundry, take care of our, yardwork, run errands for him, literally serve him food/drink when asked. he claims differently; "i wasn't there 4him. i was mean/horrible person" i'd ask him 2 help out w/our daughter (dr appt, lunches, make sure she got asthma meds)4example. ask him 2spend time w/us insted of being on the comp for 15 hrs/day on his off days, go w/us 2 fam functions. when i'd ask ask, nothing wld happn i'd get mad (is that wrong? 2expect help? a lil fam time f/my husband?) so i'd say "WTF?! can i get a lil damn help? can you spend a lil time w/us" he'd get mad, arguments would ensue, we'd end up saying mean things 2 each other that caused a lot of hurt (bitch,horrible wife,shitty person. i'd say similar things too; "lazy, get off your ass, take a lil interest on our kid). there were also times we'd be in each others face arguing, he shove me away, i'd end up doing the same. so yea, we'd put hands on each other. i'd walk 2 another room, he'd follow, vice versa. never felt like he would take initiative. so i guess my asking, became nagging, which turned into bitchiness b/c i was tired of feeling overwhelmed him not doing anything (or so i felt like). so i guess my hub basiy came 2 dis-like me, say i'm a mean/horrible woman, i harass him continually, that i've him, squashed his feelings, kept him f/being a dad now he's finished w/our marriage. i've driven him 2 feel this way about me. "single handedly ruined our lives, i've told u what u cld do to fix this, u just don't give a shit". he's "sailing his own boat w/o my mean abusive ass". i'm having a really hard time dealing. 2wks ago he was saying he loves me, happy abt our due in 6wks, loves our family. now he wants no part in it. "i'll be there 4 my. but u, i don't give a shit about". that hurts so much. my hearts breaking Am i wrong? lipstick swingers Corralitos California
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Often times what people notice, are the "fruits" that certain choices yield, and neglect to challenge the "plantation" of certain "seeds of information" (touch, look, speak, feel) All depends on who defines a relationship. I look at modern day situation, and its depressing, but people chose to live a certain way, it was not forced on them. Each family, each partnership, decided one at a time, that they were not going to sustain their dedication to "the family" unit and it drifted apart to "i got my share, you have to earn yours or have it with you if you want to play with me" Its no wonder everyone sings about and all those drama stories. It gets people thinking emotionally (emotional thinking is suicide) there is logic to life and reason. Back a few generations, people got married because of qualities and abilities of another partner, that could be added to thy own, and that made everything run smooth. No matter how bad he/she hurt me, there is more benefit to her/his presence then some little mistake. Now-a-day, we get married on Friday night, divorce night and everyone is happy (at least how it seems) Priorities and reason have to be life in order for a relationship to be meaningful for life. A family is something that takes a life to observe, raise, educate (-, grand, great grand, etc) a few pets dont last that, nor do companies, wealth, health or a party life style. There is NOTHING a and a woman can undertake, that would be such a lengthy process, that would require them to be together for a life time (other then family) With that said, back to txt msgs that people of real experience in communication. 20 years back i didnt have to txt her every 4 minutes or reply, now its divorce if you lose a phone for a day. Electronics have been invented, to capture you and your attention, not to make your family/friends relationships more meaningful. vedis for fuck Wallowa Oregon online hot nighteven if it b a haul, you benefit from knowing what to expect and perhaps it be good for you to hear from the Doc. that the way she acts with you ay have nothing to do with yu at all. :) I need to run. good luck. female friendship
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