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You know your wife has strict values and would not accept this behaviour in her marriage and yet you withheld that information from her. Now, months into the marriage, you realize the error of it and want to fix things by quitting the use. You erroneously believe you are hurting her by not fulfilling her sexually? Really?? You have just stated to us what is important to her her religious. Your deception is much more damaging to your marriage than your use. If you want to try and salvage your marriage, you have to acknowledge that. I would suggest that you seek counselling alone to begin with. Come to terms with why you allowed your actions to be so hurtful to someone you say you, and then seek joint counselling if she agrees that your marriage is worth saving. Your marriage was built on a lie. older swingers getting one more 92009
Here is a cut and paste from the wikipedia article on Maslow's hierarchy of needs: All humans have a need to feel respected; this includes the need to have self-esteem and self-respect. Esteem presents the typical human to be accepted and valued by others. People often engage in a profession or hobby to gain recognition. These activities give the person a sense of contribution or value. Low self-esteem or an inferiority complex result from imbalances during this level in the hierarchy. People with low self-esteem often need respect from others; they feel the need to seek fame or. However, fame or not help the person to build their self-esteem until they accept who they are internally. Psychological imbalances such as depression can hinder the person from obtaining a higher level of self-esteem or self-respect. Most people have a need for stable self-respect and self-esteem. Maslow noted two versions of esteem needs: a "lower" version and a "higher" version. The "lower" version of esteem is the need for respect from others. This include a need for status, recognition, fame, prestige, and attention. The "higher" version manifests itself as the need for self-respect. For example, the person have a need for strength, competence, mastery, self-confidence, independence, and freedom. This "higher" version takes precedence over the "lower" version because it relies on an inner competence established through experience. Deprivation of these needs lead to an inferiority complex, weakness, and helplessness. lady with her boatBut not really the rest. I'm not absolving the party having been cheated on from any responsibility at all. Certainly they could be responsible for the deterioration of a relationship or marriage through their actions or inactions. My only absolute is that even if a relationship or marriage has deteriorated, it is still a relationship and all the same rules apply as when the relationship is. Marriages and relationships are not like jobs. You don't try to find a replacement before you quit the old one. Regardless of the health of a relationship it is the responsibility of both sides to either try to fix it, or put an end to it, before moving on. dating and sex
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