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with you, I can in some ways understand his situation. As a father you try to do the best you can by your. You try to do it while maintaining a career to keep the roof over their heads, food in their stomachs etc. You also are trying to keep your marriage happy etc. I still have some very mixed feelings about my father. He let me "figure it out" on my own lots of times when just a little bit of help from him could have made a world of difference. The results have been good, I am who I am, but yes, I still resent him somewhat for some of those hard decisions. OP didn't do his kid any favors by making everything so easy because the real world isn't easy. That said, I get how he ended up in that situation. Ive seen it happen to friends with their. It starts with the car in high school. Kid needs a car, you want him/her to have a safe car not the rusted out shit box you had when you were a kid. Forget the fact that the shit box was good enough for you back in the day, should be good enough for them, but what the fuck right? So you decide to use it as an excuse to buy yourself a new car and give the kid your old car. At least its safe right? Never mind your 'old' car is a 2 year old E class. So the kid gets spoiled. Never learns the value of a dollar. Turns into a worthless little shit because you wanted what was best for him because you have very varied memories of how hard your life was on the way up and you don't want your kid to have to go through it. All the while forgetting that those hardships made you who you are. It stinks for OP because at this point, there isn't much he can do. He can start to cut the kid out, but I guarantee you the grandchildren be thrown in his face every time he tries to change anything. But he made his bets, now he gets to play the hand. Bettor or worse. i need a running mate
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