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He wants answers NOW? Tell him he can't have them now, period and end of story. Look him straight in the eye and let him know you AREN'T the same person, you have changed. Let him know HE has a decision to make. Accept that you are unsure AND leaning toward divorce and he gets to deal with that however he wants. Also we won't be having any of HIS version of some new perfect marriage, IF this is to work out there be something you BOTH agree is a good relationship. Tell him to back the fuck off, you realize it took two of you to screw this up but he isn't going to be able to fix your issues. That you don't blame him for your feelings, they are your's but you sure as hell aren't going to shoulder the load for his. He should have thought of that ago. Then get YOU to some counseling because you do need some help in my opinion, you do need outside perspective. That person that was starting to emerge needs to finish coming out sans all the new connection bull. That needs to happen regardless of if your marriage works out. So tell him you are trying to figure this out, but you'll do it on your own time frame, the only other option that's available is to make the easy choice divorce. 23 yr old femalesince hindsight is . we don't really know what was really spoken nor even know what was really understood by him at the time. she in her mind think by having sex meant going exclusive. in his mind was the timing was good and both of them can enjoy themselves without making commitments, being adults and all. some women just want some without commitment also. if she feels that she is only doing him the favor by having sex then that is not good. if she did not have a good time but was doing it to secure or believe this is what one must do in a relationship then that is wrong also. i don't think i am saying it right, but now that we have the opportunity to things in hindsight, we judge his actions under her state/frame of mind going into it but we know little of his thoughts. we hear her words of what he said, through her anger but really do not know the tone or the context it was really spoken under. maybe i am over-thinking it. girl looking for sex
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