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While I adore strong women and always have, and while a woman "taking charge" turns me on to no end (actually ONLY strong women turn me on), there really is no concern about being at this point. I am well past the point where anyone can do anything to me. While I still feel in some ways like that small blonde boy, I am not a small and have a tendency to intimidate people without meaning to. This is why I also feel confused because, for example, the one woman I fell totally in with was very strong, dominant, but small and petite so I was not only following her lead and letting her lead me to exciting experiences that I would not have on my own, at the same time I felt extremely protective of her and DID protect her. That's where my confusion between submissive and dominant comes from she was "running the show" and I only wanted to please her but I also felt like her guardian, advisor in those areas she had less experience in, etc. How can I be submissive if I feel no need to be protected by someone, and feel more like a protector? That's what I ask myself. I have actually had women I don't know come on to me very strongly, grab my hand and drag me to their bed BECAUSE they felt that I had been their protector. (stopping abusive men from harassing them in a bar, etc.) I do have some very dominant aspects to my personality. That's why I feel confused. xxx with women Essington
I am letting not to the point where I'm "out and proud." My thing is that I fear if I come out and then miraculously find a I'm attracted to and him, people think I'm lying to myself. I get crap already from some friends I've told who know I am choosing not to act on my attractions to girls. I also fear the pain it would cause people I know to find out I'm even attracted to girls. It's a serious choice to me. sexy Urayasu duck girlsHe's not going to change for you, either, not in terms of basic character. The stuff you are describing are all basic building blocks to living in the world. Hygiene? Really? There's low-maintenace, women who wash their hair, let it air dry, and remember to throw on some chapstick. They tend to men who low-maintenace, unfussy women. Other women can't get ready in less than an hour to go to the mailbox and their men tend to appreciate the package. You are what you are. If you have some areas in your life that YOU want to improve because they are meaningful to YOU, then you should do so. Learn how to cook, learn how to care for a home efficiently, learn the charm of really listening to other people instead of always being the one doing the talking. These are life skills, not bait for a trap. NEVER remake yourself into something you think a would like, because every wants something different and half the time, they can't even tell you what they really want, because they'll "know it when they -/feel it." Your boyfriend sounds like he'd be better off looking for a good nanny than he would a wife. A mother and a father bring different things to parenting, if he thinks he's looking for a female version of himself, he's got a lot of learning to do about relationships. hot chick
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