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My went to bed before us due to an early morning job and told us to enjoy ourselves. We along to some old songs, snuggled on the couch, and then started making out. He checked in with me before each shift in the dynamic of our intimacy to be sure he wasn’t overstepping any boundaries. I told him everything was fine and that the only reason we wouldn’t be able to have sex that evening would be because I didn’t want to disturb my sleeping by getting a condom. Luckily for us, he had one handy so we laid out a blanket on the floor of my fiancé’s music studio and had sex together for the first time in about years. The next morning while brushing our teeth together, I told my guy that “ our friend got laid last night.” He asked, “by you?” and looked a little shocked and/or hurt. I restated that yes, I’d had sex with our friend. After my shower, I checked in again to be sure I hadn’t unintentionally acted outside of his comfort zone. He assured me that my sleeping with our friend was not an problem, but he didn’t appreciate my delivery of such information because it sounded like I was shirking responsibility for my actions by saying HE got laid rather than WE had sex. I thanked him for making that clear, apologized for being insensitive by making a silly allusion to the joke we’d made the night before without first seriously letting him know what we did, and promised to do better next time. Later in the day, he asked me for more details, such as if we used condoms and the specific location of our connection. I confirmed that we used protection as is our agreement and asked if he would have preferred we not “invade his space” by using his studio. He took no issue with us being intimate in his room and told me he was grateful we didn’t wake him to get a condom from our bedside. I’m grateful for how we learn from each other how best to communicate our feelings and actions. naughty horny matchLet me preface this my saying that I've spent all afternoon working on a spreadsheet of mind-numbing proportions only to have it close without my saving it. Needless to say, my motivation to continue working on that project just flew out the window. I have to confess I've been lurking for some time. Although I'm a grown-up (I swear!), I do have a which give you a little info on my life. It took me a time to write all that stuff, so I'll save my space here for something a little more on topic. I've been married, dated men and women, and am currently in a LTR with a woman. Since my marriage, I've been resistant to labels, although I've found NOT labeling myself to be damned near impossible. For now, I guess I'm fitting in well with the lesbian community. However, as I've gotten older, I've really had to admit to myself that, in terms of who I'm attracted to, I'm indiscriminate about gender. Bisexuality, to me, feels like the ultimate in "normal". I mean, gender seems like a rather mundane thing to use to define who I find attractive. Not stressing over whether I'm "straight" or "-" has been liberating to a point. I also find it stressful and confusing. I'm finding it difficult to maintain the LTR during periods where I find myself primarily attracted to men (and yes, the possibility that I just have a problem with monogamy has occurred to me, but I'm just trying to wrap my around one thing at a time). I also find myself confused and saddened by society in general. The stereotypes associated with bisexuality are stunning. I wish I had the latest copy of The Advocate sitting with me. A reader was spouting off some hateful comments about bisexuals (or, rather, the stereotype of bisexuals). In my personal life, I've run into more than a few queer types who were downright angry about bi's. "Please don't judge me for the person whom I, but let me tell you who you SHOULD be judging." The double-standard is frustrating. I won't even go into the straight person's stereotype of bi's. I think the forums speak for themselves. So, that's it for now, I think. Part intro, part rant, part philosophical musing. I've been entertained by you guys for awhile now, so I feel a little less guilty about my voyeurism now that I've introduced myself. bbw sweden
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