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While bemoaning the judgment of others, people into kink seem to be as judgmental of others as vanilla people are of them. “Emotional Illness” could be used to describe enjoyment of pain, being tied up, D/s. Coming out and discussing one's desires risks humiliating rejection and ostracism at both ends. Either for being too strange or not strange enough. The human mind seems adept at compartmentalizing beliefs, comfort zones, and taboos. Let it be known you’re a bi-male and be prepared for a shit-storm. Couples actively avoid you, single women seem to treat you with disdain. Personal ads even have “NO BI MEN!” written in them. Stupid thing is no woman avoid you outright if you said you were into giving anal and she hated it. It would just be a boundary to respect. The same judgmental people however are all into bi-women. Couples with straight women seem to suffer the same hypocritical judgmental nature and have a harder time of it as well if they want to participate in couples only settings. start with finger fucking
You say, "Some people give themselves to their partner completely and freely. All they ask in return is respect." I'm just trying to wrap my mind around that. How can she respect her husband when he clearly has no respect for her? How can she respect herself when the kink he demands from her makes her feel completely disrespected? Can you really not correlate her needing to keep breastfeeding and sexuality separate? By your thinking, what if her husband had an fetish, and demanded she role play as a little girl, and he role played as her father-rapist? Let's say she's an survivor, and she's disgusted, but she plays along a couple of times. And the mind fuck has put her psychological health at risk. So she tells him, no more. No can do. So he pouts, and sleeps in another room, and treats her like shit. He pouts like a and tries to bully her into compliance. Her body? Her choice? Is there really no boundary in your world? Because if I was ever put in that situation again, I believe I'd stab the bastard in his sleep. blk for sexy Bormes-les-MimosasAs I it so far, we have roughly this exchange going on P1: Our play can hurt sometimes. P2. It hurt you, but it doesn't hurt me. Now shut the fuck up. That's one fucked up bdsm scene, in my opinion. And it's a sad statement about our (in)ability to act as participants, let alone experts, in consensual anything. Right now the best that can be said is that we're good at being a bad example. I we can bring this back to some kind of center. And while I'm motivated to write this because of the current discussion about how to deal with the more graphic content, it's actually been a problem here for longer than that, at least to me. There's been a really unpleasant thread of just out and out shitty behavior here for at least the past month. A good example is when someone wanders in and asks an innocent or even totally ignorant question, there seems to be almost a koi-like feeding frenzy to who can be the first and meanest to ridicule them with "that's not kinky" or "take it to the rofo" or "learn to use e." I don't know what's triggered this kind of behavior, but even before this discussion it was almost enough to have me simply stop participating here. There's bdsm, and then there's *just plain violence*, and we seem to be having real trouble recognizing where the boundary is. I we keep talking about it enough to be able to find it again and get back on the rght side of it.. Suggestions to follow later, if anyone wants them. free adult dating
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