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Even if it were to happen or not, it is but a minor side issue in this drama. If it does occur the divorce focus only on this and the underlining problems continue to fester and make for a bitter divorce. Not only is your focus twisted but you are most likely suffering from what I like to selective memory. The both of you have gone through a hell of a lot in this spiraling dance of death of a relationship. You both have forgotten how to be civil with each other, loss of mutual respect. That is the first to go when communication breaks down. In his defense of his despicable actions, he is worn down and frustrated in this marriage. You have two choices, arm yourself with new behaviors when confronted with adversity or continue to do the same failed behaviors, go read or get counseling on how you set rules of engagement. You are acting on here, exactly how you deal with problems in your marriage. Instead of focusing on the break down of communication, your focus is on the by products which are spun off from this problem. You started this story as a self sacrificing martyr, but I sense that is not really the case. Whenever you suppress feelings and thoughts they have the nasty effect of erupting elsewhere. He in turn is responding and behaving poorly in turn because he too is imagining the worse also of you. You both are feeding off each others responses and escalating matters. I an impending disastrous storm unless drastic measures are not taken. It is now the lull before. Vernon married but lookingWe were having dinner watching Wheel of Fortune last night and as always Sajak (sp?) was introducing the contestants. One woman said she was married to a Wonderful named well that part doesn't matter. The next woman said she was married to an AMAZING. I put my spoon down and asked my wife. "What's the difference between a "wonderful" and an "amazing"?" Without missing a beat, she said "Ohhhhh about 3 inches." damn funny . I laughed hard. So then I asked, (probably shouldn't have) "So am I wonderful or am I amazing?" She looked at me, patted me on the arm and said "Eat your soup, Dear. It's getting cold" adult networking
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