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If that be the case then I can only offer this advise. When you vowed for better or worse this wasn't the future you envisioned for yourself. It would seem to me "your" vows are holding strong and his are getting weak. This is not necessarily the end of the road for the marriage. Threats are just that and if you his bluff then you must be prepared to it through. If he is in and out of the relationship now then he is most likely planned or planning his exit strategy already, Spouses are part of a plan for the future in hopes of happiness and life together sharing and learning coping and correcting the bumps and bends of life in hopes of a white picket fence and tulips in the yard. don't always work out that way. Look at your situation through fresh eyes and ask yourself why you stay, Divorce sucks and no one here dispute that fact, but sometimes it's better than the alternative. are your legacy to this life, blood is thicker than water and you must protect theirs that's your job. What you show them now,they take with them when they go out on their own. How do you want your future to reflect on theirs? Help her get the car if you think you can handle the payment when she can't and tell him you want to a therapist and if he refuses change the locks on your bedroom door. You can't kick him out of the house but you can kick him out of your favor. You need to find out what is most important to him as well. After all he "IS" your spouse and entitled to half the responsibilities. His monetary investment isn't always the best but ask yourself what does he bring to the table? But that's just my opinion. just for sex West EndI just got back from my trip to the Tricities, and all I can say is: Holy Crap! Warning: Story!!!! I arrived down there Saturday afternoon and had the house to myself for about an hour. My aunt and grandpa came home and started their normal routines (feeding dogs and watching TV). Well, my aunt gets the idea to go paint her office. A little while after she goes out there we hear a huge CRASH! She makes it through the door into her bedroom and I haul her up onto the couch. She announces she broke her foot and needs to go to the hospital. It takes about an hour to get everything ready and I have to let my grandpa drive her while I stay there and care for her dogs (she trains assistant-companion dogs for the deaf). I try one more time to convince them to let me drive (it was getting dark and my grandpa is a scary driver in midday), but to no avail. They leave, I look around, and am instantly wishing my mom had the day off work. There was a mountain of dishes, laundry, barely any vegetarian friendly food, and large hungry dogs to take care of. So I get started. About 5 hours later they get back. My aunt is in a splint and on crutches, doped up on pain medication, but still a little shaken. My grandpa is cursing up a storm about how bad the freezing fog was and how slow everything was. I get them settled and fed. And just when I was about to settle down, my aunt falls over. She couldn't get her crutches moving fast enough and ended up on the floor. Luckily nothing got hurt, again. The next morning I make breakfast for everyone, clean up from it, go to the store, put everything away, make lunch, clean up from that, and make sure everyone is taken care of. About an hour before I am supposed to leave for my brother's going away party (air force), my aunt decides she absolutely has to have a carrot cake with cream cheese frosting. So I make the stupid cake and frosting and set is out to cool so they can have it later. I'm running late so I grab all of my stuff as fast as I can and head out the door. I get about 10 away and onto the onramp and my car sounds like it is in a friggin' trash compactor. woman seeking
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