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looking fwb and get togather and fuck instead of "fix' is "identify." You need to identify why this happened so it doesn't happen again. If you identify something in you that needs work, by all means go for it. I'm not trying to imply that you're % "cured" becasue you finally broke it off. My concern when you refer to yourself as 'something is wrong with me' you are hearing his words. So yeah, something was wrong when you picked this guy and ignored (probably) red flags, but it doens't mean that there is always something wrong with you. girls in oklahoma city
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-'s thread and her concern (that I know has been shared by of us over the years) about sanity in the face of some let's admit it bat shit crazy activities that we choose to do, has me thinking about guilt, and self identification, and SSC versus RACK. For the purpose of this discussion, let's clarify that SSC means safe/sane/consensual and RACK stands for Risk Aware Consensual Kink. One of the most important things that I have heard in my 4 years in the community is that nothing we do is particularly sane, but if we are aware of the risks and do what we can to mitigate them, we are doing enough. Hearing that from someone who was qualified enough to teach a class instantly made me remember all the times I'd worried about being crazy or how fucked up was my psyche that I craved/needed to be beaten and degraded. And I felt all that lifted. Ok, I'm not necessarily sane. But I am careful and all my partners consent. Why I want these things doesn't really matter because there is a wide world of people who don't have one shred of commonality with me, except that we like to be beaten and degraded. So it isn't my past and it isn't any one thing, so why worry about it. I am capable of having intimate, loving, otherwise "normal" relationships and I have found a way to have the most amazing orgasms of my life. What's wrong with that? I guess my point of discussion is whether or not identifying as SSC or RACK increases the burden of "am I crazy" we allow ourselves to. sweet grany toyboy fuck picturesIt has been my experience that relationships (finding one, being in one) are a very complex endeavor even without adding the question of race into the mix. You wrote: "I'm looking for a LTR no matter race yet I feel limited to only black men." What I am hearing is the race of a partner is of equal value to you as is his character and/or his feelings for you. Of the LTR I have been in I have noticed:. They came when I wasn't looking for or expecting it.. They came when I was focused on improving and/or enjoying the blessings in my life. (going to school, building my career, enjoying my family and friends).. I met the guy(s) in the least likely place: hardware store, out walking, at a straight bar. The age, race, etc. of those I have been in relationships with played no part in our meeting, falling in or establishing a relationship. I share all of this with you to say looking for a relationship is fine, but looking for a happy, fulfilled life is much more important and is much more satisfying. Please don't worry about the race of a potential partner, just make sure you're heart is open to accepting when it comes. single women looking for sex
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