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But as stated in my above response to F-G, we have two small dogs that we are both attached to and I would never keep him from seeing them. When I think in terms of "deserting" him, I do so because I would not leave our apt- he would. And he would go back and live with his mentally ill, addicted, alcoholic mother. Just being around her would probably send him back into a full-blown relapse that would land him in rehab, jail, or a grave. I don't think I'm ready to make the move that enables that change in his life. I him, certainly, and I do not want to him go down that terrible path. And since he is unemployed, he doesn't have other housing options that I can think of. I know I need to put myself first but I don't feel I'm ready to kick him out yet. I don't understand his decision not to engage in his hobbies.. I think they are anxiety reducing but his depression zaps his motivation and when he can barely motivate to get in the shower, playing guitar or writing music..well, that probably takes more motivation than hopping in the shower. i'm sorry if i made it sound like he has no interest in improving. He DOES want to improve. He wants nothing more than to have a relationship with me, to contribute, to get, to quit smoking, to do all the things he used to to do. He never learned coping skills and being without a good therapist and not being properly medicated, well, that seems to be a big hurdle to learning coping mechanisms. granny swingers TalkeetnaAdmiration Infatuation Unconditional My admiration was to an older guy in high school. He had a car, a job, lived on his own, and did all of this on his own as his family abandoned him when he was 13. He started working at 15 and worked two jobs up until recently when he got into managment. My infatuation was to a care free hippie guy in high school. He played the guitar, loved to draw and paint and really had a different, exciting point of view on some things. My unconditional is to a guy I met in high school. For years we went off and on a few times and we always came back to each other. With my admiration, I learned that you can't someone for what they have, or what they are doing. You have to them for who they are. With my infatuation, I learned that you can't someone more than you yourself. With my unconditional, I learned that was only the beginning of a relationship and your grows and changes each and every day. The admiration and I broke up because I was 'holding him back'. The infuation and I broke up because he was just a terrible boyfriend and always chose his friends over me. And the unconditional and I are currently married. :-D I think that there are kinds of loves, and each one teaches you a lesson and builds your mind and heart. I learned so things from my prior loves that I now know where to say "no" and I now know that you can't truly someone unless you yourself. dating singles
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