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I'd find a private place to talk, and clear the air. Offer something complimentary or flattering to ease the transition to the inevitable "But " and explain how you felt overwhelmed and incredibly uncomfortable. Tell her that you didn't mean to make her feel bad or ruin her night by rejecting her, you just weren't expecting things to turn out like they did. Explain to her that you would be uncomfortable messing around with someone who was married, and that you spend most of last night freaked out that this cause drama at work, and that you're having this talk to hopefully avoid that. Anytime she tries to interrupt, let her say what she has to say, don't try and ram the conversation down her throat. Then steer things back to the "endgame", and explain that you want to remain friendly at work, but you aren't interested in anything romantic between you guys. If you don't talk to her, you are failing to act. Failing to act means you have to REact to whatever drama she stirs up. I think having a conversation (a sober one, after the fact) is necessary to clear the air. Otherwise, take what comes. discreet sex RacineAs an HIV positive guy, I find your commentary here to reveal A) a misunderstanding about HIV risk factors and B) an ugly bias against HIV positive people. First of all, 'bluekirk', rimming is a very, very, very low risk activity for transmission of HIV, so you really had very little to worry about when rimming the guy whose partner was HIV positive. Rimming is much more risky for parasites and hepatitis (which can be extremely serious if you contract Hepatitis C or Hepatitis B). And 'DTM61', you stated in one of your posts regarding guys cumming down your throat: "Then you worry about these poz guys doing shit like that, because they know you are married or bi." The implication is that an HIV positive guy would intentionally infect you because you are married or bi? Why?! Why would any HIV positive person be more likely to want to infect you because of your marital status or because you are bi as opposed to?! The truth of the matter is that the VAST MAJORITY of HIV positive guys live in total fear of infecting another person. We know how difficult it is to live with HIV and the last thing most of us want is to visit that hell on someone. In fact, most of my HIV positive friends and I would much prefer to date another HIV positive person because in those cases we don't have to worry about transmitting the virus to someone. If you think HIV positive people sit around trying to think up ways to infect other people, then you are sadly, tragiy mistaken. And finally, 'philaguy' is absolutely correct. You both should treat casual sex partners as if they are HIV positive and act accordingly. And I might add you both need an education in how HIV is transmitted. live sex webcam
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