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Bare with me for a sec cuz I'm just thinking this out but I think people also forget that marriage is very different these days than it used to be. Gender rolls in western society were far more rigid. Men were expected to support their wives and financially and wives were expected to support their husband and emotionally/domestiy. Men were groomed to be the "men of the house" and women were groomed to be "good wives and mothers." I think a lot of the problems with marriage today stem from a blurring of those rolls and people having to define their marriages for themselves with a LOT more gray area. It's WONDERFUL but also very confusing. Particularly since most people are unaware of just how much the feminist movement has changed our society as a whole. It's kind of nice to think that men of my generation actually think that women are their equals. It's still happening though and things are still be ironed out. Both of your examples prove my point. "Men need to help more" -> Indicative that the male gender roll still hasn't quite solidified to be "obvious" that men need to also do things traditionally thought of as a wife's roll. The need to keep dating their spouse, I think, is fallout from the fact that women are now able to walk away from marriage without being social pariahs. They have a lot more choices (choices traditionally reserved to men) and though it's a touchy subject it's not nearly as acceptable for husbands to rape their wives. The "not enough sex" issue and cheating has been a millenia arguement so not so new. Men have been keeping mistresses for as as there were "monogamous" relationships. What I think is interesting is that men are less able to go outside of their relationships without their wives/gf's leaving them and SO it also leaves a certain amount of responsibility on the part of the women to try and keep their menfolk happy. Again fallout from the blurring of gender rolls. Where women were previously more dependent and unable to leave in a lot of situations or chose to turn a blind eye, we more and more this cheating is unacceptable so now what? situation. mature Minocqua ladiesMy GF and I have been together for almost 3 years now. She pushed for us to move in together, which I eventually went for because we were together all the time. She also really wanted to get engaged. It took me over a year to get completely comfortable with the idea but I finally did and planned on proposing this christmas. That is until she wrote me a note and essentially told me that she does not want to live together next year, she does not want to get engaged anytime, and gave me a laundry list of things I need to improve on if I want a ltr with her. I agree with a lot of the things she wants me to improve on, they are really in my best interest and it's nothing petty. She also wants me to a therapist because a lot of my problems stem from anxiety and my severe pessimism. But since the note, about 3 weeks ago, I can't help but be angry with her. I'm not sure if I'm angry with her or with myself, or if I'm trying to improve myself for me or for her. Or maybe I'm just reeling from having a future I was sure of just yanked out from under my feet. Sorry for the post, if anyone even read to this point, thank you. I just needed to throw this out there, even if no one hears it. looking for group parties
seeking a Niagara Falls dominate demanding woman actually, I am a LOT of a seeker and I find myself on a spritual quest. I have studied lots of different religions, tried some on . left most, am finding my own way, my own path to enlightenment. Currently, I am reading Neale Walsch's books and finding them extremely interesting. He shares a view that all our emotions stem from really only two places . fear and. That really hit home with me today, as I can sense someone I care about starting to get involved in a romance (we don't talk or as much, just short clips here and there and much less personal, basiy one liners). My initial reaction was just to cut the cord, be done, go on . I thought of it as simply my loner side, don't need anybody take care of yourself, etc. Actually that is a place of fear.. fear she won't want or need my friendship any longer when I should be coming from a place of . being happy and excited for her, continueing to give and be open. I am a way from enlightment, but I am looking and I have less and less fear in my life. Explore your world.
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