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ca65 college student looking for discreetApparently I've turned most of the households I've lived in into meals-together ones. Some people confessed to me years later that they'd ever actually had that. I didn't know I mean they always came to my table and no one ever complained. Cook dinner. Make it about the same time every night (within an hour). Set the table nicely, water glass, remove magazines and non-meal clutter. Time the items to be ready and hot at about the same time and minutes before go around the house and tell people dinner is ready would they come to the table? If they are under 18 add would they please wash their hands and come to the table. Good smells coming from the kitchen pull them there. The nicely laid table tempt them to sit even teenagers. A few firm words tip the scales with the and teenagers: they sit. Asking, would you sit down and share this with me while it's hot?, usually get the adults to sit at table. And once they are there, good conversation and good food keep them there. If they really have to run after a few minutes, don't give them grief: they'll be back the next day. It is human nature to socialize over food. So it isn't too hard to persuade lone-eaters to give up the habit. Granted its some work on your part. Do this if mealtime is important to you. It is hard for anyone to resist a hot meal that is waiting at 7pm every evening they'll start to plan around it, look forward to it. You shouldn't have to guilt-trip anyone into sitting with you for at least ten minutes while they eat. If someone can't talk to you for ten minutes: they don't like you. Ten minutes is about how it takes to quickly consume a meal. It might be like that for months before nature takes over and they start slowing down. don't hurry to get up from the table, yourself, keep your habits. If you get bored, read a book or write activity that keeps you interruptible when/if other people wander back through, let's you notice and look up at them. don't watch TV. When I'm at meal, I'm at meal. Everyone is welcome to join me for either a short or a time. If they want hot food, they're going to have to stay at least enough to serve themselves out of the common dishes. And they might as well sit a minute while they do that. 10 years is a time for bad habits. But this one, you can break. married and dating
bored who wants to be spoiled the Butch-Femme Society's monthly meeting about 3 months ago (acutally it was 3 months and "part B" was 2 months ago, but I missed "part B" I'm still kicking myself.) Of course the answer is very individual and not objective at all, but here's my "readers' digest" answer. No non-sense (which does not mean lack of a sense of humor), not-forced, not-trying-to-hard-affectation, real, comfortable with who she is without obviously over-analyzing herself. Confident. Someone who takes care of herself in the broad, term sense of the phrase. (I beleive we take care of what we value.) In other words, not only showers regularly, and dresses in clean clothes, but also eats well, exercises, doesn't smoke, knows how and when to relax and has a sense of priorities "don't sweat the small stuff." And I can occasionaly the female side of her through the butch. The feminine voice, maybe smallish hands, a penchent for chit-chat something "girlish" just under the surface of all that butchness. Other than that, I haven't really spent any time at all thinking about it much ;) cool laid back man
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