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Whether you're a lesbian or not, you loved, and suffered a heartbreak. So, my advice? Extend the obvious care you have for your patients toward yourself. After two years, you should be able to move on. And diving into a bottle isn't for you, especially as a way to kill the pain. The pain fade. Try focusing on something, something that nurtures you. Something that's always made you feel better, or something new. Or lots of new things! Working out at the gym does wonders for me. Even walking try a new park in your city every day after work. Or begin a new creative venture, teach yourself to paint, or go listen to music, some. These things feed the soul, and eventually can heal it. Do you have friends you can talk with? Perhaps counseling? There are also GLBT organizations that have support groups and counseling available. Maybe separating your feelings for this woman from any confusion you feel over your sexuality would help. looking for a cute cougar milf for fwbI've been asymptomatic HIV+ since the beginning. years ago, my doctor (with the best of intentions I'm sure) started me on meds prematurely. My partner had died. I was going through a terrible time of grief, job pressure, and family (his) legal problems. My immune system was clearly stressed, and my viral load spiked. Being at a low point in life, and very vulnerable to all the authority figures in my life at that time, I agreed to start meds. Big mistake. I've been fine, perfectly except for all the side effects of taking meds. I finally got fed up with having my life boxed in my meds and have discontinued them. Feel better than I have in years. Feel like "myself" again, not "altered" by a phalanx of messing with my mind. I continue to be monitored regularly and am resolute in my not to go back on meds unless the docs can clearly demonstrate that it's in my best interest. Meds are not to be taken lightly. Sure, they've got most of the meds down to a pill or two a day, not like years ago when it was a handful times a day making adherence so challenging. Still, it has a powerful effect on your mental/emotional state of mind, and this aspect of taking meds looms very large as time goes by. Meds can consume your life. It's very easy to get wrapped up in all the "what-ifs", and become morbidly obsessed with your. You can easily paint your life into a corner with paranoia and depression. Meds have their time and place in the scheme of things. Please, just take your time, consider all your options before making such a (possibly irrevocable) decision about treatment. sugar babies
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